#honesty it could be the other way around i just need the difference in perspective from these two

[pan-withnoplan]

Jiang Cheng is the type to reason that there are two holes, one from which the liquid comes in, and another from where it comes out, because the straw is cut at two points.

Wei Wuxian would bs the type to fiddle with the straw, look at it from all angles, finally look inside it and realize "wait, a straw is a long hollow tube, doesn't that mean that there is, technically, after all, only one hole perpetuated by the form, as long as it gets?" or some shit.

justify your reasoning in the notes!!!

[ham1lton]

QUESTION TIME?

pairings: (platonic) lewis hamilton x f1 driver!reader.

warnings: sexist comments. interviewers asking rude questions.

summary: being the only female driver on the grid means being the unofficial spokesperson for women in motorsports and you’re tired of it.

author’s note: a part of my newest series! i’m still actively looking for more scenarios and ideas regarding this universe! so if u have any thoughts or questions? let me know! i’d love to hear them <3

“do you worry that being more open and accessible to different drivers will lower the level of competition within formula one?”

the silence could be cut with a knife. everyone in the room looked at you expectantly, eyes wide as they waited for your answer. you took a sip of water as you collected your thoughts.

sometimes, when you were younger and karting, you’d wish that you had been born a boy. that might have been an unpopular opinion but you held it occasionally, although not for the reasons one might think. being a man would have meant that you would have been treated as just another driver rather than a novelty. no one else on the panel was expected to act like a mouthpiece for their entire gender.

taking a deep breath, you composed yourself before addressing the question. "i understand the concern about maintaining the high level of competition within formula one. however, i believe that diversity and inclusivity in motorsports can actually enhance the competition rather than detract from it."

you glanced around the room, meeting the expectant gazes of the reporters and fellow drivers. "by opening up opportunities to drivers from different backgrounds and experiences, we bring new perspectives and skills to the sport. this diversity can drive innovation and push the entire field to new heights."

pausing for a moment to gather your thoughts, you continued, "i don't necessarily think talent and competitiveness are determined by gender or any other factor. it's about skill, dedication, and passion for racing. embracing diversity not only reflects the world we live in but also strengthens formula one as a whole."

as you finished speaking, you could sense a shift in the atmosphere of the room. while your response might not have been what everyone expected, you knew it came from a place of honesty and conviction. and deep down, you hoped that your words would spark a broader conversation about the importance of inclusion in motorsports.

the room digests your response, slowly and steadily until another interviewer speaks up. "i get where you're coming from, but let's be real here. formula one is about pushing the limits, about being the best of the best. we can't afford to water down the competition just for the sake of diversity."

you respected his perspective, knowing that he always spoke his mind but god, if that wasn’t the worst way to word that. "i hear you," you replied, "but i don't see diversity as watering down the competition. if anything, it's about elevating it. different perspectives bring new challenges and force us to raise our own game. isn't that what racing is all about?"

he paused, considering your words. "i suppose you have a point," he conceded, nodding thoughtfully. "but we still need to ensure that the drivers who make it to formula one are truly the best, regardless of where they come from."

you nodded in agreement, acknowledging the importance of maintaining high standards in the sport. "absolutely," you agreed. "and i believe that by embracing diversity, we can do just that. it's not about lowering the bar; it's about expanding it to include drivers who might have otherwise been overlooked."

after a moment, lewis, who had been your unofficial mentor throughout the process of integrating into formula one, raises his hand. he had been listening to the whole exchange with a furrowed brow.

“i just want to echo what y/n has said,” he began. “diversity isn’t a threat, if anything it’s our greatest asset.”

he turned to address the room, his gaze steady. "we've seen time and time again how diversity helps drive innovation and pushes the sport forward. and it's not just about gender or race – it's about welcoming drivers from all walks of life and giving them the opportunity to shine."

lewis paused, letting his words sink in. "formula one should be a reflection of the world we live in – diverse, inclusive, and full of opportunity. and by embracing that diversity, we make the sport stronger, more competitive, and more exciting for fans around the globe."

you smile at that and grin at the interviewer.

“is that a good enough answer for you?” he nods and your remark sparks laughter in the room. after a moment, the interviewers target your peers and you take a deep breath. free at last.

when the interview concludes, you find yourself walking step by step with lewis, who smiles at you.

“you answered those questions well. i’m proud.”

“just followed the hamilton playbook.” you tease. “who knows? maybe i’ll be fighting you for that championship next.”

“i’d welcome the challenge.” lewis laughs, his eyes bright with amusement. “but seriously y/n, never underestimate the power of your voice and your presence in this sport. i always say that the goal is to leave the sport better than we found it, and you’re only in your second season and doing that. i have no doubt you’ll achieve great things.”

his voice is thick with sincerity and he places a warm hand on your shoulder before leaving. as he disappears, a young girl wearing your merch comes bounding up to you. she’s grinning wide with a missing tooth and when she speaks, her accent is thickly american with a strong lisp.

“y/n! hi!” she waves a massive poster in front of you. it has your name, your number and a message of support. “y/n you’re the coolest! will you sign my poster please?”

with a warm smile, you kneel down and grin at her.

“of course! i’d be honoured.” your assistant hands you a sharpie and you scrawl your signature in the corner of her poster. her parents taking a photo of the two of you and then with her parents permission, you sign her hat and her shirt. “thank you so much for all of your support. it means everything and more to me. keep cheering me on okay? i do this for all of you.”

“i will!” she beams. you laugh and pass your assistant her pen. “you’re my hero y/n! thank you!”

she bounces off and her parents wave while saying their thanks. your heart swelled up after that interaction, reminding you as to why you do this. why you deal with all those incessant annoying questions because it gives you the opportunity to help inspire the next generation of young racers.

as you stand there, you see a guy with a camera walking your way. your eyes widen as you make a sneaky escape. today has been filled with enough questions, you think as you hide out in gavin’s office.

[thedenofravenpuff]

Ballora and Eclipse's Relationship - A Ramble

I love the growing friendship between Ballora and Eclipse V4 on EAPS.

Which to me is a funny observation if you go deep lore on it, like an obsessive fan (is me, I'm an obsessive fan)

Wall of text under the cut

If you look deep cut into FNAF, I always liked to consider the Daycare Attendant kind of related to creations like The Puppet and Ballora. Ballora is a marionet, a performer, a doll for the stage. The Puppet a security measure, a caretaker, meant to look after special kids, but failed (Charlie).

The DCA are built like dolls. Marionets with intricate parts, originally meant to be performers for the stage but then repurposed to be caretakers, protectors of children. Like Puppet and Ballora they stand out against the animal themed animatronics that always took center stage.

On EAPS Ballora was introduced as a vapid person, only eyes for herself, calling others 'peasants' and refusing to get Puppet's name right. In EAPS they played up how Lefty was Puppet's replacement in the TSBS universe, as a model, while in FNAF lore Lefty was created as a means to capture and contain the possessed Puppet. A failure, compared to the fates and purposes of creations like Ballora.

Ballora only showing interest in friendship with the DCA, something she feels related to. Even to a point where she sticks around even when Sun and Moon each proves to perplex her, because they are programmed so differently from her. Yet she still insists in feeling a relation towards them, over anyone one.

While still acting high and mighty over others, to Sun and Moon she is more open and calm. Wanting to spend time and expand on them as people, as individuals.

This need becoming useful to Eclipse, because the EAPS DCA are very quickly attached to him, because again, an unspoken relation binds them together. Eclipse has the experience that could benefit the two baby AI that learns and grows very different from how Ballora does, as she was clearly more 'finished' in her programming to be ready to perform while not much older than Sunpea and Moonpea. Eclipse have been both of them, he is a copy of Sun and Moon both, no matter how much he hates this fact.

When Eclipse needed help the most to get through to Sunpea about his obsession with seeing real magic, Ballora came through, recognizing Sunpea needs to be spoken to in a specific way. She respected Eclipse's need to hold some distance to things that pulls back to where he came from. To a point he THANKED HER. Granted, he spoke the gratitude AFTER she left the room (much like when New Moon apologized for Old Moon's abandonment of Eclipse, when Eclipse V3 had already left the room).

Eclipse V4 is already a friend to Earth, the one he has dared to attach to because she actually cares to know his side of things. While not taking offence but actually gaining from his refusal to sugar coat things the way her family and partner does. She isn't perfect, she needs to be told that now and again.

In this other dimension.. Ballora is gaining his trust in other ways. She accepts the things he says but dares to speak up that other perspectives exist. But not in the same way others around him does. Puppet is NOT on same wave length, Puppet is just using Eclipse and he knows it, even if Puppet denies so to themself half of the time. Ballora is full of herself, but so down to earth around Eclipse and the EAPS DCA.. she isn't Earth, but connecting to Eclipse in different ways.

She hasn't shamed him, yet tells him off when going too far. She hasn't lied to him, she hasn't forced him to do things. When she says "We are friends" it is with even more honesty than Earth because she holds no baggage that Earth has. Ballora is still young and new. She has nothing to gain from lying to Eclipse, she holds no power over him like Puppet does with the EAPS contract. Heck, I'm sure her hazing Puppet is a great source of amusement to Eclipse.

When Eclipse dropped out from that Gang Beast video after Puppet ONCE AGAIN forced Eclipse to interact with Lunar, despite his protests time and time again, all acted like they did not understand his reaction at all.

Because Ballora is the one to actually care. Eclipse has said out clearly what he wants and what he dislikes, and others, especially Puppet, has an attitude of "get over it" or "you deserve it."

Again, Ballora has no baggage to judge Eclipse with or add any 'but' to things she claims or says to him. She genuinely wants to be his friend as much as with Sunpea and Moonpea. While recognizing the DCA still has some growing to do, realizing she was programmed to start off more mature, while Eclipse IS already the most mature around. Sunpea and Moonpea are made to learn differently because they have to interact with children, with humans, directly. They have so much more to learn and expand on, than a performer meant for the stage.

I like the duality it gives Ballora. She is a primadonna full of herself. She talks to her bandmates and mocks Puppet by refusing to acknowledge knowing her name. Yet so patient and kind to the DCA and so eager to give Eclipse the understanding and care he so needs.

She truly grown on me over time, showing this much duality to herself. Her priorities and her own growth as a character, the more she learns of things she can do as (and despite of being) an animatronic.

I love her interactions with Eclipse for this. And I truly feel, with Ballora, Eclipse V4 can count two whole genuine friends, who actually cares and listens.

Thank you if you read this far. Just needed to ramble on this for a bit.

[bestworstcase]

What do you think Salems goal is, exactly? It's obviously not ending the world to kill herself, but honestly I feel like she has ulterior motives than just "overthrow the gods".

I personally wouldn't be surprised if she wants to rule in the Gods stead after overthrowing them. She's already brought up replacing the gods, and seems to believe that humanity "needs" gods/guidance, but specifically Not The Brothers. I only say this because she was the one who said that humanity was more divided than ever without the gods and that they need guidance (and essentially replacement gods), not Oz.

It's hard to say whether she Still believes this, but since she parallels Darkness (to an extent) and destruction is essentially taking out the old to make way for the new, I definitely wouldn't be surprised. The Brothers are the old, Salem is the new n all.

I just find it hard to believe that all she wants is to overthrow the gods and do... nothing afterwards. I believe characters like Cinder have stated that they're going to be high up in her new world?? I'm not sure tbh.

Plus, I think her goal being that she wants to rule the world after killing(?) The Brothers would be an interesting dilemma for the main characters. Overthrowing the gods? A good idea even Oz would agree with. Salem ruling? ...Well that might not be such a good idea (she *did* immediately go to "let's spread our word and destroy anyone who goes against it" in the Lost Fable, but I have different opinions on whether or not it's reliable so it likely doesn't matter to you). Either way, it'd make things interesting for our heroes. At least, that's how I'd write it.

Thoughts?

to be clear. my stance on the reliability of the lost fable is that jinn answered with absolute honesty exactly the question ruby asked, which was “what is ozpin hiding from us?”—i think she obeys the same rule ambrosius does. you get EXACTLY what you ask for.

so ‘the lost fable’ includes:

information ozpin knows or sincerely believes to be true, AND

actively chose to hide from team rwby, oscar, and qrow.

the reason jinn frames it as a fairytale (“once upon a time…”) is because she is conveying specifically ozpin’s perspective, and fairytales, stories, are fundamental to how he sees the world. she is telling his story in his words, because that’s what ruby asked her to do!

but the lost fable doesn’t include:

anything ozpin doesn’t know

anything salem told ozma that ozpin believes to be false, except when a synopsis is necessary to provide context

anything that ozpin knows but wasn’t actively keeping a secret (for example, the story omits her answers to his questions about the other relics because neither their original locations nor their powers were something ozpin was hiding; he told them what the lamp could do, when they asked, and if they’d asked about the others he would have told them that too).

so jinn herself is not an unreliable narrator per se, but the question ruby asked necessitated that jinn tell only ozpin’s side of the story, without filling in any gaps in his knowledge or correcting his misunderstandings and mistaken assumptions. the lost fable is therefore honest (in the sense that no part of it is a deliberate lie) but biased and limited (because ozpin is fallible and doesn’t know everything.)

which is something ozpin himself points out in his commentaries in the fairytale anthology—on the infinite man: “no one who wasn’t there could know what really happened. and even then, they would only have a small part of the story,” for example.

all of which is the long way around to saying that i do trust the dialogue in the lost fable to be accurate to what the characters actually said, and the scenes to be accurate depictions of events as they happened (if he was there) or as ozma imagined them happening based on what salem told him (if he wasn’t). the parts i don’t trust are the narration, because that’s the part colored by ozpin’s perspective, and the elisions of ozma’s dialogue in the key ozlem scenes, because things salem says in response to ozma lack the context of what ozma said.

(think about what listening to someone make a phone call is like; if the conversation is about a complex subject, it’s difficult to follow along and easy to misunderstand what the person you can hear is really trying to express.)

and on the topic of those elisions: if salem wanted to rule the world herself, i think she would have made an effort to do so before ozma returned. she is demonstrably capable of both merciless conquest (razing vale) and inspiring awe (slaying the nevermore). she’s immortal. she cannot be killed. before ozma returned there was absolutely no one who could have prevented her from, like, taking over a kingdom and expanding it into an empire with herself as the eternal god-queen.

but she didn’t. she lived alone in the woods, in a miserable hovel. given the well-maintained path leading to her doorstep, she had to have been visited on a regular enough basis for whatever community lived outside the woods to go to the effort of paving the way to her shack. which says… village witch.

left to her own devices, that’s what she did with her life: found some village or town at the edge of a forest and built herself a little house in the woods, just close enough that the townspeople could find her when they needed her but otherwise isolated.

and then once ozma found her, they fixed up her house together and lived happily for… apparently quite some time before ozma brought up “humanity seems more divided than ever” as a problem.

there’s nothing in the lost fable to suggest that salem wanted anything more than the life she had with ozma in that cottage. everything she says about bringing humanity together is specifically in response to OZMA telling her he wasn’t satisfied. she’s supporting HIS stated ambitions.

and like… she’s not… wrong? her phrasing is extremely blunt, but… you can’t bring people together without giving them something to believe in—a cause, a creed, a faith, a purpose—no one is going to unite for the sake of being united. ozma despairs that “humanity seems more divided than ever,” and salem goes… well yeah. the gods killed everyone and fucked off. people just need help. we could help. we have the will and the means to change the world, make it better than before.

but.

the problem is.

the task ozma was given isn’t to help people or make the world a better place; it’s to prepare for the final judgment by uniting the whole world—the god of light instructed him to end conflict full stop. ozma needs everyone to unite in submission to the brothers.

and salem is absolutely correct that you cannot achieve that except by conquest. you cannot, you cannot, you cannot unite the whole world under one creed without genocide. it is impossible.

this is why i say the divine mandate is a fundamentally genocidal ideology: the premise is that humans as they are now do not deserve to exist and must be ‘redeemed,’ and the only way to achieve ‘redemption’ is through genocide. the logical end of any ideology that requires universal adoption or universal acceptance of a certain belief or creed is genocide.

salem understands this intuitively; when ozma asks her “are we sure that this is right?” she spells it out to him in plain terms that it’s what is necessary to achieve his goal. her implication is that if the end does not justify the means, he needs to reconsider the end. i don’t think she cared either way as long as ozma was happy, until she learned the truth about what he wanted to do and why.

as i’ve said before, i believe her final statement—why spend our lives trying to redeem these humans when we can replace them with what they could never be?—a) reiterates her longstanding dream of humankind overthrowing their “old masters” and claiming the power of creation for themselves to “perfect their own design” and b) quotes/paraphrases the closing lines of ‘the shallow sea’ to express this idea because she’s trying to communicate in ozma’s language, through stories.

and i think ozma understood her perfectly well, he just doesn’t think her third option of rejecting the mandate is possible. in the present, oz only suggests salem is out to destroy the world when he’s trying to scare hazel into turning against her; what he tells his inner circle is that salem’s after the relics because she wants to “change the world.” he believes she’s doomed to fail.

anyway, as to the question of what salem wants now: it’s revolution.

pretty… overtly. “your so-called free world.” her protégée was an enslaved child who grew up wearing a shock collar in the gilded heart of ozpin’s crowning achievement some sixty years after the vytal accords abolished slavery, and the huntsman who found her in that situation used her suffering to groom her for the huntsman academy instead of using his authority to help her by enforcing the laws against slavery.

watch WOR: kingdoms. compare the almost tender tone with which salem talks about the democratic councils that represent the people to the utter disdain she has for the huntsmen academies that exist solely to train “the next generation of defenders who will fight and die to protect the lifestyle that they’ve become so accustomed to.”

she wants to defeat the god of light, yes—or at least prevent him from ever returning, i do think Plan A might be “destroy the relics”—but she also wants to tear down the systems ozma built to uphold the divine mandate, systems that turned a blind eye to slavery and injustice and abuse. she wants the whole world to know the truth.

i think she also probably wants humans to coexist in peace with the grimm, and i suspect that will be the biggest sticking point; but salem clearly feels affection for the grimm, and—gestures at menagerie’s lack of a grimm problem—coexistence between people and grimm is possible, and because salem herself is grimm she’s never going to have peace or freedom until the existential war between humans and grimm is ended.

and i think she does intend to make good on her promises to her inner circle, in some form. hazel believes she’s planning to create a “new world order” (which, definitionally, a world with no huntsmen academies and no everlasting war is) and mercury says she’s “promised [them] everything,” which he takes to mean that they’ll be “top dogs in her new world.” but the one thing we know for certain about what salem offers to her followers is very vague; all of them project their own desires to fill in the gaps and come away with wildly disparate ideas about what this ‘new world’ will look like.

what salem has always wanted is freedom. she’s never shown any personal ambition to rule—even her rebellion, she isn’t the one who leads the charge, she walks among them. before ozma returned, she was… just the village witch somewhere. i do think it’s really quite likely that her plan is to tear down everything ozma built, destroy the relics or defeat the god of light, participate in rebuilding from the ashes to ensure that the new world isn’t founded upon lies or subjugation or eternal war against her existence, and then just… find a place where she can live. all she ever wanted was to leave the tower. i don’t think that’s changed.

[theflyindutchwoman]

Given recent discussions in the fandom and because I’m curious to hear others’ opinion… would you want to see a Chenford breakup next season?

All right, let me start with my usual disclaimer : this is only my opinion and it has no more (or less) value than anyone else's. And this isn't meant as a personal attack either, regardless of which side of the equation you're in. I actually enjoyed reading other people's takes on this, particularly the ones who want a breakup, to see their perspective on the subject. It was truly interesting (no sarcasm).

To answer your question, dear Anon, no, I don't want a breakup. Mainly because I feel that so many shows go there, so I'm more interested in seeing Tim and Lucy navigate the ups and downs together.

One thing that attracted me to their relationship was their ability to talk to each other about everything and anything. How, despite their differences and their rocky start, they could always confide in each other… Be extremely vulnerable. And that is what I would love to see going forward. How this shorthand they've developed by working together can translate into their personal relationship. Don't get me wrong, just because they are usually good at communicating doesn't mean that it is perfect. It's not. Even before they became a couple. There are some cracks that became more and more visible as the season progressed. The theme of 'honesty' was their main thread in 5b. The storylines involving Sava & Jake or Isabel served to highlight that aspect. To emphasise how lies, deceit and miscommunication can destroy a relationship. Now it could be used as a foreshadowing… Or it could be used as a warning. Tim and Lucy already have a much stronger relationship, so I choose to believe that this could be a learning experience for them. Learn from other people's mistakes, learn from your past (in Tim's case).

Right now, those moments of dishonesty revolves around one common theme : work. Tim taking a desk job without consulting Lucy first… Lucy doing the five-player trade behind his back… Him trying to lie at first that he wasn't bored out of his mind… Her not saying anything about Primm (as far as we know)… Him not wanting to open up about his fears regarding undercover…  Those are starting to pile up and they're going to need to address it. The sooner, the better. Particularly the undercover talk. This has been a long time coming. It's clear that Tim is terrified but doesn't want to burden Lucy with this. And she can sense it. That last scene in 5.21 was (for me) a step in the right direction where they started voicing their concerns. It's nowhere near sufficient. But they stopped avoiding that topic altogether. Like I said, they can be great at communicating… But they can also be their own worst enemies. They're both selfless when it comes to the other… they're both used to do things a certain way. And now, they need to learn how to do these things together. To talk about these moments that may seem insignificant to them but isn't to the other. To stop making decisions for the other. This is quite new to them : as we've seen in the past, they didn't truly open up to their boyfriends/girlfriends. That's something they are going to have to learn together. And that's okay : this is part of the journey of being in a relationship.

Another reason why I don't want to see that is related to the characters' growth. The thing is, I actually could picture Tim breaking up with Lucy because there is a pattern here. If he got it into his head that he is holding Lucy back, an idea already planted by Noah in 5.16, then yes, it wouldn't be out of character for him to break up, thinking it's the right thing to do for Lucy. Which is not that dissimilar to what he did in 5.02 : sure, they weren't together, but it still felt like a separation. Especially since the end of that scene mirrored so well another one from 1.12… when he decided to divorce Isabel. And if you remember, that was pretty much for that very same reason : he was afraid that being with him would only remind her of her time as an addict and bring her down. So he did what he thought would help her the most and decided to divorce her. So breaking that pattern would be a tremendous character development for Tim (in my opinion). Then, there's the fact that this is something they knew would be coming up at some point. This isn't a new obstacle. The episode before they got together had Lucy go undercover. And Tim, even more so than her, knew what he was getting into when he told her that it was worth the risk. He may not have explicitly said it but the implication that she was worth fighting for was right there. So breaking up for something that they could foresee kind of negates those words. And it would play right into Lucy's insecurities. She was so hesitant because she didn't want to lose what they have. She is finally letting go of the fears that prevented her before from fully committing to a relationship… Her certainty in them is absolutely amazing. So breaking up now would hurt her so much. (I focused mostly on Tim here because I struggle to see a reason for Lucy to break up. At least, not if this is related to her career, be it undercover work or her promotion).

Now, that's not to say that it can't be executed in a beautiful way. Sometimes breaking up can help strengthen a relationship, as odd as it might seem. Sometimes it gets too much and taking a step back can offer a new perspective and a fresh start on healthier grounds. Just like sticking in a relationship at all costs can be very damaging and toxic. I mean, take a look at Lucy and Tim in their last respective relationships… They stayed well past the expiration date. But I, personally, would rather see them work this out together. See them 'fight' and argue, like they've done in the past… that very same thing they didn't do with Ashley and Chris. See them all vulnerable with each other, like they've also done in the past. I honestly think the writers could pull off the angst and drama with this storyline, without having to resort to a breakup. But again, that's only my preference :)

[amuseoffyre]

Mulling on the way Stede and Ed have both learned to talk around their desires and wishes, whether as a defence mechanism or because past experience has made them cautious about expressing themselves. This has led them to have very different ways of saying what they need in very carefully constructed way and sometimes, missing what the other is saying entirely.

Since it got long, I'll show mercy :)

I've written before about the way Stede leans into the passive voice in season one. He doesn't directly express an opinion, coming at it from the side so he can't be blamed if it's a bad suggestion.

A prime example is when he tries to dissuade Ed from going to the party by describing how bad it'll be (from his perspective) or when Ed's considering leaving and instead of asking him to stay, he says Ed doesn't need to rush off and "we're all enjoying your company".

Based on his past experience, it's no small wonder, when his every suggestion to his father was shot down with scorn and disdain. His likes and interests were mocked relentlessly and constantly criticised. Even Mary shouted at him about the ship which - he thought - was his idea of the best future for him with his family. For him, expressing how he's feeling is something that can be weaponised against him.

He not only hides his feelings, but when he's feeling especially bad, he hides himself as well. He leaves situations when he's distressed or unhappy: leaving his family, hiding in his cabin in 1x01, retreating in the party in 1x05, going back to the ship in 1x08, returning home in 1x09.

The one time he does express himself verbally to Ed, before the academy, he's mid-retreat to the ship. He's angry and upset and insulted by Calico Jack and is taking himself elsewhere, but Ed stops him and says he should stay.

And this is where I chew on their communication mismatches, because Stede has been sitting and sitting and sitting all day, all the negative stuff building, stoked by Jack's cheerfully applied passive aggression and manipulation. He's been smiling through it for Ed's sake and when he loses his temper, he falls into the same pattern of not being direct. He doesn't point the finger at Jack for his behaviour, which has been the trigger the whole time. He tells Ed "I don't like who you are around this guy", his focus being 'this guy' who has caused this change in Ed's behaviour.

But Ed hears it as something being wrong with him specifically. He doesn't hear that it's Jack's influence of behaviour. His own self-esteem is so brittle, he immediately takes this as being fully his fault and when he's given the choice to stay with Stede or go with Jack, he leaves and says "You were always going to see what I am."

This not only cements Stede's conviction that saying what he thinks aloud will get a negative response (in this case, Ed leaving), but also solidifies the fact that Ed is fully convinced that Stede would eventually come to dislike him as much as Ed dislikes himself. Neither of them said what the other thinks they said, but because it's informed by their own trauma and issues, they radically misinterpret the other's meaning.

Like Stede, Ed edges around directness as much as he possibly can. Given what we've seen of the people from his past, it's clear that honesty and earnestness are subject to mockery at best and, at worst, the thing he cares about will be taken away from him.

Instead, to avoid the risk of that, he tends to drop hints, make roundabout suggestions, uses metaphors and allegories, and tries to nudge people to understanding what he means/wants.

He doesn't want to leave but doesn't know if he's welcome to stay, so he just makes noises that he's thinking about moving on so an invitation will be extended. He doesn't care about the invitation to the party, but maybe, pfft, not like he's bothered, but they could go. Whatever.

If it does get to a point where he's upset he - like Stede - will try to remove himself from a situation and hide away. It happens in 1x06 during the fuckery, 1x10 inside the pillow fort, 2x04 at Mary and Anne's.

It's very telling that the times he does let his guard down a bit, it's when someone goes after him. He and Stede have their most direct conversations when Ed is hiding under a yellow blanket, even if Stede is still bemused by the 'doggy heaven' metaphor.

A lot of the time they're both like ships passing in the night when it comes to communicating because they're both trying so hard not to show too much vulnerability. It's there on the beach at the naval academy when Stede tries to deflect Ed from China by pointing out "it's quite far". It's there in Ed's fishing metaphor which has so many layers and Stede has no idea wtf is going on because he has none of the context.

Stede has learned to be more direct in S2, so much more so that he actually expresses his feelings and emotions aloud for the first time. He talks about it with Lucius, Zheng and Anne, even before he and Ed have their breakthrough in 1x04 when, at Anne and Mary's, Stede frankly and directly explains himself to Ed and it helps them get back on an even keel.

Ed isn't quite there yet, though, and this is why the fall out in 1x07 comes out of nowhere for Stede because he's missing a lot of the information that Ed has threaded into the metaphor.

He knows Ed doesn't want to be a pirate, but the subtext all through the fisherman conversation is like they're having two different conversations. Stede is being so much more direct by pointing out that Ed is panicking and offering options, but Ed is deflecting as a defence again.

What's lovely is that by the final scene, they're sort of getting to the same page. Awkwardly, tripping each other up a bit on the way, but they're getting there, realising there's a lot more to each other than they had understood before. The entire exchange has so much layered into it.

Stede: so we're innkeepers now? Ed: I thought we could give it a go. Unless you're having second thoughts. Stede: I'm not. Ed: It's a bit of a shithole. Stede: It's a fixer-upper. Good bones.

On one hand, it's about the building and oh the symbolism of him wanting to make a place where people choose to stay with him is aaaaaa.

On the other hand, it's both about Ed himself and their relationship. Ed couching his meaning in metaphors again and this time, Stede picks up the meaning, even if he doesn't fully get all the nuances of it. (also teehehehe 'good bones'. I bet there are)

They're working their way towards better communication, a little bit at a time. They've both had their lowest ebb, run in panic, and learned from it. There's still a lot of trauma and defence mechanisms to unpick, but they're getting there.

Now if Stede could stop bottling up his trauma and hiding them in his wine-cellar of the things, that'd be great.

[sweetlikehoneystingslikeabee]

Could i request gotham, BTAS, telltale, and Arkham riddler with an asexual s/o?

Gotham, BTAS, Telltale, Arkham Riddler with an Asexual s/o

Absolutely you can! I've actually seen some hcs around for various Riddler's being ace and I can totally see it even if it's not my personal interpretations. Kind of the nice thing about doing interpretations for comic book characters is there's so many people on this tiny screaming rock and we can apply all different perspectives. I hope you like this!

TW: NSFW (nothing particularly graphic but still talking about sex)

Gotham

If he were being honest (and honesty is most of what he would like to give to you), sex is not his top priority. He wouldn't classify himself as asexual because he's got kinky predilections- yet his life is certainly not going to be much different without it.

If you're okay with him (safely) exploring solely sexual things with other partners, then he will. If not, then he won't. That's rather the purpose of places like the Foxglove, isn't it?

Furthermore, if you were alright with him exploring with other partners and aren't sex-repulsed, he wants you to be involved (in a sense). Not sexually, he wants to add. But he thinks it's only fair you meet the people- especially if they're regular. Get a feel for the place. Even if you're not participating, he wants you involved/knowing in all aspects of his life.

That's what partners do, right? They make things work because they love each other and they keep things transparent. It isn't much of a question for him, it's the answer.

Ultimately what will happen is based around your comfort. He'd give it all up if that's what you wanted. Just holding you at night sleepily kissing your shoulders in your own little world- just the two of you.

BTAS

Explain it. You don't need to exact any personal details or anything if you don't want, just explain what asexual means for you and how you both need to proceed.

In his world and time it's not something you hear about often, but he's more than willing to learn. He's the type who, once you explained it, would go on to think of historical examples of people who were the exact same way! Isaac Newton, Nikola Tesla!

He's going to tell you in scores that what he's in love with the most is your brain, anyways. You're wonderfully attractive, yes, but your mind... How could that compare to the mere distractions of the flesh?

Is he going to still desire you in that way? Yes, but if he feels himself getting too riled up he'll go to another room and "take care of himself." Just give him a kiss when he comes back and he's going to be pleased as punch.

He's going to ramp up on the romantic dates. It's a point of pride for him that if he can't express his love in one way because you don't like it, he's going to go at it another route that you do like and appreciate. Fortunately with all his dorky charm, he does make a pretty good date.

Telltale

Oh? Is that it? When you originally told him you had something important to tell him, he'd assumed it would be information that would change your relationship in a big way.

It does not. Were you expecting a larger reaction?

The truth of the matter is, he's an older man with a reduced sex drive anyways. Any drive he does have can easily be satisfied on his own, if that's what you were worried about.

If you were worried about it, he'll tell you not to be ridiculous. He cares for you. If he didn't, he wouldn't stick around. Having or not having sex would be such a petty deal-breaker in his mind considering how few people he truly likes much less could love.

And he loves you. You should know that by now. He's not going anywhere.

Arkham

One of the first things he would ask is if you would care if he had "just sex" with other people. Knowing his reclusive state, you'd likely give a teasing scoff and ask who he was planning on asking. He concedes and says it's logical for him to just take care of himself. That's okay.

That being said, he would greatly appreciate and encourage... materials from you for his masturbatory use (yes he says it just like that). Dirty pictures of you posing in various states of undress should do the trick if you're not comfortable jerking him off or being in the room with him when he does. He's not going to judge!

He makes it rather clear that he wasn't interested in you for sex. He could get sex from anyone. But you're not anyone, are you? No, you're better than them and therefore suitable to be in his company.

If anything, expect a tad more of that quiet romantic side to come out. Similar to BTAS- If he isn't going to show you how much he really loves you in that physical sense, he's going to have to up his game. Expect him to be a bit clumsy in this because he has the social skills of a feral cat.

It might be difficult for him at first to make his physical touching towards you more tender than sexual. A lot of this does trace back to those poor social skills as he's isolated himself further from other people and "normal" interactions/dating. But he's making the effort because he needs you to be happy with him.

[3ris-d1st0rtionnn]

StoLE tHiS fILe FroM THe aRcHivES… dON’t TeLL @speyeralling-down-thy-majesty , bUt i JuST WantEd a LittLE MemENtO oF ThEsE EvENtS… eVEn ThouGh tHeY’Re StiLL iN My HaLLwaYs SomeWhErE :)

Statement of Jade Connor, regarding a strange theme park attraction. Recorded by [REDACTED], head Archivist of the Magnus Institute.

I don’t even know why I decided to send this your way. I know you won’t believe me, nobody does, I just… I need to feel sane for once after last week.

It was last Saturday, if I’m remembering right. I had taken my friend Emma out for a day at this small theme park at the edge of town. Emma Davis… That was her full name. I have to keep reminding myself.

The park was really nothing special, just a small place with a few standard carnival rides and food stands. In all honesty, we were just coming up on finals at university and needed to relieve the pressure with some mindless entertainment, but I had a sort of nostalgia for that park. I had been going there since I was around 8 years old, so I know the place like the back of my hand… It’s no wonder that I picked the new building out so easily.

It looked a bit like one of those old “ghost train” rides, but none of it was visible from the outside. The building was just a small, weathered black box with faded murals painted on the front that I couldn’t make out at all; if I looked closely, I could have sworn I saw the remnants of painted faces, but the paint had streaked and bled too badly to see any details. The only legible text was the word “FUN” in pink and green block letters above the singular entrance door. No information, no name, just “fun.” That should have been my cue to stay away, paired with the sense of paranoia I felt just seeing that damn building, but Emma was already heading in by the time I noticed, shouting her usual lighthearted mockery of me being “too scared.”

I can’t explain how, but I knew I couldn’t let her go in there alone.

The interior of the building was… strange. It definitely wasn’t a dark ride like I expected, more like some kind of funhouse. The entrance led us into a dimly-lit hallway; the walls, ceiling, and floor were all painted black, but it looked… unnaturally dark, as if we were standing in an endless void. A series of doors were painted on the walls, each one skewed oddly in perspective and painted in neon colors so bright, they hurt my eyes to look at too long. I could have sworn there were ultraviolet bulbs set up somewhere, but I couldn’t see any visible light fixtures… or anything, for that matter. No fire sprinklers, no exit signs, no electrical panels… Nothing.

I don’t know how long I was lost in my thoughts. My mind was screaming at me to turn around and leave, that something just wasn’t right here, but I was forced back to my senses by a low creaking sound. One of those doors, the ones that couldn’t possibly be real… somehow opened. It had been replaced by an opening in the wall that looked like it had always been there, with no trace of the door itself to be seen. I could hear Emma’s voice laughing in the distance, calling for me to “find her” and “catch up” before blending in with a cacophony of indistinct background music.

All I could do was run after her.

The hallway opened up into… I can’t even say if it was a room, a hall, or something completely different. It looked like the interior of a dark ride with no track, just a winding path surrounded by these strange props and cutouts, each one painted in those same, blinding neon shades. None of them looked like they were supposed to be animated, but I could have sworn I saw them moving from my peripheral vision. Everything around me was just… constantly shifting and changing, even the path itself was winding off into oblivion. And the music… That damn music. It sounded like 5 tracks of frantic cartoon music looping over each other. I couldn’t make out any words, any instruments, whether there were actual voices or if it was all an instrumental, but I felt like there was something in there, like a message I was supposed to understand. Did I hear Emma’s voice up ahead, or was it part of the audio? There was no way I could tell, but I could have sworn I heard her laughing.

I had to have been walking for hours, maybe even days. My ears were ringing, panic building up in my chest as I broke into a run, screaming out Emma’s name, struggling to navigate this deteriorating maze of lights and colors. The walls had faces. The props were pointing at me and laughing. The path was narrowing, trailing off into oblivion and herding me in one direction until… Until I reached the room. Until I saw it.

It was a small room, completely filled with doors. They were all stacked on top of each other, defying logic and space, the walls extending upward infinitely like some twisted rabbit hole I was at the bottom of. I somehow knew not to touch them, that they wouldn’t let me leave yet. And in the center of it all… God, I can’t describe the thing.

It was twice my height, this… complete mockery of a person. Its arms were far too long, allowing its clawed, twisted hands to scrape the floor as if they’d been dislocated from their sockets. The thing smiled, the corners of its mouth extending past its face, exposing what had to be around 7 rows of teeth. Its eyes constantly shifted in color, spiraling voids that pierced right through me. It said nothing at first, but I could hear the audible snap of its neck as it tilted at a painful angle, motioning toward one of the doors nearby.

Just past that door, I could hear Emma’s voice. I couldn’t tell if she was laughing hysterically or screaming, but the sound was… completely unnatural, a noise that came from the very depths of insanity.

“Don’t worry, she’s having fun.”

The thing’s voice felt like broken glass scraping my brain, like a voicebox that was nearly out of battery. My head pulsed with pain, a primal instinct of panic overwhelming my body.

The next thing I knew, I was sprinting down another hallway. My vision was fading in and out, the ear-bleeding soundtrack returning to laugh at me as that figure blinked in and out of my peripheral vision, always behind me as if it knew I wouldn’t get anywhere. The last thing I remember was dropping to my knees, my nails sinking into my arms as I screamed, and…

..and then I was back outside. The second my eyes snapped open, I was lying on the pavement, surrounded by concerned onlookers and emergency personnel. I can barely remember what they claimed had happened, something about a “spontaneous breakdown” leading to me collapsing.

It had only been two minutes since I apparently “broke down.” The building was nowhere to be seen.

Asking about Emma led to the same response of concern… There were no records of her ever entering the park. There were no records of her anywhere; trust me, I checked. Not in the contacts on my phone, not online, nowhere. It’s like she was just… erased as soon as that thing took her.

I haven’t left my home since then. I can still hear that damn music looping in my ears, I can see that thing in the corner of my eye… It’s only a matter of time before it comes for me next, and I know it won’t let me go this time.

Statement ends. A follow-up has been requested, but we can find no records of a “Jade Connor” or their contact information in our databases, except for this transcript.

[purity-town]

No update today -- next chapter's cover has had a good chunk of progress made on it, but I'm too busy tomorrow to get it finished up to post at a reasonable time. (This works out well anyhow, as I'll be moving back down for college next week, so if the current page wasn't partially finished already I may have not had the time to complete an update.) In the meantime, finally getting around to posting ask responses (below the cut)!

I'm really glad to hear you're liking it! Life's been a little crazy lately, so updates have been more scattered than I'd like, but I'm still thoroughly enjoying making this comic, so I'm you're enjoying reading it!

Looking at the timestamps, the first page was released on December 12th, 2020. So we’re just past 2 and a half years now!

The actual “development” of the story technically goes a bit further back to the time around the 1.4 update release, as I was getting really into the game lore and wrote up some worldbuilding ideas. Then in late November of 2020 I started planning a fanfic based on that, did a short 2-page comic set in that AU for fun, and then ended up expanding that original fanfic into the current, longer comic!

I’m gonna tentatively say yes! At least, one per Andrew and the Clothier each. There wouldn’t really have been a reason to make more than one of Andrew. There technically could’ve been more made of the Clothier, but one was all that was really needed.

Fortunately this current set of backgrounds outside of the dungeon is relatively simple, as I reuse the base coloring for the columns and adjust the perspective/lighting as necessary (each column is actually two pieces -- one “flat” side and one “angled” side).

I have a pretty limited capacity for doing backgrounds, so I tend to use tricks like this to reuse them where I can, haha. The first few backgrounds for an area tend to be harder, as I need to make assets and figure out how I want lighting and so on to work, but from there it usually gets easier.

It's still dependent on the background's design, of course -- backgrounds that are painted (usually outdoors) are a much different experience to work with than areas with detailed lineart and textured surfaces, such as the tavern and Andrew's kitchen. I'm slowly getting used to the perspective tools in Clip Studio Paint, though, which is helping a lot with drawing indoor spaces!

In all honesty, I was mostly focused on making it immediately recognizable even in silhouette, and that it fit well on the page, rather than focusing on making it perfectly to scale or the likes, haha.

Design-wise I find the Wall of Flesh to be super interesting -- it visually ties the “first” boss of progression (EoC) in with the last boss (Moonlord). And it’s overall very jarring, in that it’s easy to accidentally summon and turns the Underworld into an inescapable auto scroller in a way none of the other bosses do. And of course the story/lore significance, etc. etc. etc.

So when the time comes, I hope I can do it justice!

Honestly, I’m not sure! I still haven’t totally decided how that whole sequence of events will go -- some parts of it are very clearly planned out, others not so much. In a general sense, I do think that Chris’ reaction could vary significantly with the circumstances -- how much of a shock it is, and if he understands the significance of it -- but generally wouldn’t be good, in a horrified/panicking sense. 

At the current point in the comic, Chris *does* have a general idea that something weird is up with Andrew, just based on what Heather/Malik/Becca were saying (including Heather’s mention of “burns”), plus Andrew leaving in a hurry that morning and brushing it off when asked about it. He doesn’t believe that Andrew is evil, of course, just that he’s dealing with some things, and Chris is appropriately concerned.

So- yeah, finding a doll of Andrew in the Underworld- honestly, there are a lot of ways for him to take it badly.

But hey, once he has the doll, Hardmode won’t be far away, and that’ll bring a whole new host of problems for him to focus on instead!

[z0mbride]

ALSO I have to rant about a proselytizing nurse at work today

TO CLARIFY THIS CONVERSATION STARTED BECAUSE we were talking about knitting and crochet and I said one of my favorite memories as a kid was getting a handmade hat every year from the old ladies at church and he asked why I didn’t go to church anymore and wouldn’t accept my answer that emotionally, church has always been the equivalent for me of a book club or scrabble. Like yeah I’d love to go and I’d love to work on this together but im not emotionally invested in anything other than intellectual bonding and social connection.

But what really frustrates me is like people NOT getting it and refusing to even try but they want me to get them and I need to be just like them but they won’t even acknowledge my feelings on something.

Like this nurse was 45 and hounding me about why I didn’t go to church in front of a bunch of other staff, insistent that I must have a deeper meaning than just being indifferent to it, and it made EVERYONE uncomfortable. He has had this issue before too. And im trying to be nice and being like “yknow it’s really not due to anything other than. I’m like not worried about it man”

And it just blows my mind how that response infuriates people trying to convert you even more than a reason of hatred could. Like no, I don’t have a problem with it actually. I just really don’t care. I have no interest right now in finding out if there’s a larger being. I’m just not even worried about it. I’m spiritual in my own way but as of right now, it’s not revolved around a greater being and im perfectly fine with that.

And it’s not that im disinterested in religion, like i love to study it and talk about it and learn from different perspectives, but right now I am currently so unattached from the idea of even CARING if there’s a greater being or an afterlife. I was like yeah tbh I think that Jesus, regardless of whether or not he was real or a messiah, is a great role model when you analyze him. I really admire what he did in the book, props to him! I can see why people follow in his lead.

And he asked me if I would read the gospels with him and I was like yknow what I actually would love to talk about the philosophy with you and he’s like “no like I mean you should pray before and read a chapter every day and open your heart to God” and it was just so weird to me because I feel like he’s not getting it.

I’ve done it before (and to put it how I did to another staff member: “I tried calling but nobody ever answers, I swear”), it just doesn’t happen for me! And it’s not that I don’t believe in anything, in all honesty it makes sense to me that there’s something bigger, but I just am not worried about it, and this man could not process the thought that I am just simply unbothered. If it happens it happens.

I was talking about it to my fiance and I think that tbh this non-attachment to like reveling over this idea actually makes me a better person than if me (only myself personally) was dedicated to a single faith. I’m really empathetic with people of every faith and will talk about any religious text and am a lot more well-versed in a variety of faiths than most people think, and so being unbiased about it (other than I find abrahamic adjacent humor more funny because it’s applicable to the culture I live in) kind of has shaped me to be who I am.

Like I mean yeah probably there is some greater being but like so???? And not in a pessimistic way. I’m just okay about it.im okay with there being one and with there not being one but unless it became a compelling issue in my life, im not out here pursuing greater answers right now. Like I have acknowledged this fact but also acknowledged that im not concerned with learning more about it rn. If it reveals itself to me then okay, but you’re not understanding my “if it happens it happens” or “im living my life like water” approach by trying to force it down my throat. Like just go with the flow man ❤️

idk I guess my insanely bland view on it really irked this man because he was convinced he was going to convert me. Like yeah I will earnestly try what you said but I wish you weren’t so like freaky and pushy about it because I guarantee that if I wasn’t interested in this stuff like I was, you would’ve scared me even further away. If I am convinced by this process, then that’s all the better to me and im sure it will enrich my life in one way or another, but also stop being weird to people. Ultimately I think it’s just a difference in values. I’m not concerned about my afterlife because and not out of a greater worry like bills or anything, I just never have been. I’ve always been more concerned about being a well rounded and compassionate person with a commitment to serving other people and frankly in a way I think that would honestly make me more aligned with a by-the-Gospel person than someone stressing about making it to heaven. Obviously that’s not including the bits of terrorism used in the Bible, but you get what I mean. I think by the book Jesus would get me more than hyper-religious people insisting something is wrong with me. LIKE WHY DO YOU CARE! Why am *I* the one trying to go help a dying old man and *you* are the one trying to get me to listen to your opinion!!!! What happened to what would Jesus do!!!

[jenyifer]

Boston+Boeing= Chaos(and a sad Top)

It’s the last night before Only Friends Finale and Jenny is serving up some ol’ fashion brain soup. Come get it chaos lovers I’m going to talk about Boeing for the first time because he is entering the BostonNickverse so… I watched his scenes 3 times and have a working theory on his motivations. But as always let’s use Boston to Compare Contrast.

Both Boeing and Boston are incredibly sexy on their own and they both use that to their advantage because no one expects them to be so cunning they can be. They are used to reading people to become what they need. They are self assured that they will get whatever prey they desire so confidence radiates from both of them. Boeing uses lies of comfort with a friendly smile and willing to listening ear to get his prey where he wants. Boston on the other hand uses honesty bravado to shock his prey into whatever he needs.

Both men schemed to break apart TopMew while the couple wasn’t dating but in a vulnerable position. Both of them exploited Top’s weaknesses not because either one loved Top but to fulfill their own self absorbed reason for Top to Break Things off with Mew. Boston wanted to break things up for his friend because TopMew was messing with their friendship dynamic and on a selfish level Boston wanted to prove he was better than Mew multiplied by his growing feelings for Nick. He NEEDED to prove to top and himself Boston is the best. Boeing wanted to punish Top for breaking up with him after 3 months. I believe he did love Sand at some point. I’m inferring this from Boeings career as a flight attendant that he wanted to travel the world and bring Sand with him. Intertwining your long term goals with someone shows scars and I think you can see them in Sand’s Dream and Boeing’s career. So Boeing made a sacrifice to date Top thinking it would be a better dream someone rich and going places. Boeing won’t have to wait to complete his dream. But Top broke things off with him after 3 months. From a pride stand point Boeing couldn’t let Top get into a more serious relationship because it looks bad on Boeing he couldn’t keep Top when Mew could.

The main difference between Boston and Boeing when it came to attacking TopMew is Boston did want to keep Mew out of his scheming because he loved Mew as a brother. Boeing wasn’t going to let anyone keep him back from ruining Top’s little dream of love because Top stole Boeing from Sand which is in his head all Top’s fault. So seducing Mew meant nothing to Boeing it was just a way to get more cracks in the relationship hopefully breaking them apart forever. In Contrast Boston kept his scheming to Top. He didn’t try to meddle directly with mew because he wanted to maintain their friendship. Boston yells at Nick “NO ONE WAS SUPPOSED TO KNOW ABOUT ME AND TOP.” And he tells Ray he’d be disgusting to expose TopBoston to Mew. Boston didn’t want to hurt Mew. Boston wanted Top to be Jealous of Ray and be seduced by Boston and end things with Mew. Boston did give up after Top accused him of hating Mew or having animosity towards mew. I think that out what Boston was doing into perspective. He was crossing lines he shouldn’t. Boston decides after this to try to calm things down.

I think both failures to break up TopMew put things into perspective for Boston and Boeing. Boeing was reminded of his relationship with Sand and tried to repair it. Boston tried to settle down a bit and stop focusing on his friends. He didn’t need to meddle with them he was just getting in trouble.

Prediction time: I think Boston was the first guy Top slept with after Boeing. Boeing will happen to see Boston at the bar on the day of or day before the phone repair maybe Boeing will say something revealing about Mew or Ray and Boston will fight back for them. Either Bostons phone screen gets smashed during this OR Boeing after getting angry at whatever Boston will say will forward Atom’s expose account to the university and maybe send it around the big social circles so Boston is taken down a notch or two.

[ladyfogg]

May I? - 42/52

May I? - 42/52

Fic Summary: Ensign Faith Diaz struggles to hide her mental illness from her fellow shipmates aboard the Enterprise until an intrigued Data goes out of his way to try to understand her behavior. At his insistence, Faith tries to figure out what she’s truly passionate about and eventually seeks the professional help she needs. Fic Masterpost.

Fic Rating: NC-17

Pairing: Data/Female OC

Warnings: tw: depression, tw: anxiety, fluff, friends to lovers, eventual smut

A/N: I have been waiting to write this chapter for the last three years. Enjoy ;)

---

As she watched Data and the others disappear off the transporter, Faith let out a slow exhale. There was nothing she could do but wait for their return. Beside her, Captain Picard squeezed her shoulder before he led her from the room. 

“They’ll be back before you know it,” he assured her. 

Not that long ago she may have found his tone on the patronizing side. However, now she was comforted by the gesture and appreciated the attempt to reassure her.

“I wanted to join the away team,” Faith admitted to him. “But Data begged me not to. Time is going to crawl by while I wait.”

Picard dropped his hand and they walked side by side towards the turbo-lifts. “I am pleased to hear you were willing to volunteer,” he said, pride evident in his voice. “That shows great initiative, Lieutenant. I’ll keep you in mind for the future.”

She wasn’t sure how she felt about that. On one hand, approval from an authority figure definitely released some serotonin, on the other, it also released anxiety over actually doing an away mission. Pushing it away, she refused to let it overtake her. She had to keep her mind sharp and focused. 

“If you don’t need anything from me, Captain, I’ll be reporting to Engineering,” she said.

“Understood. Dismissed.”

He kept walking as she took the turbo-lift. Once alone, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, held it for a few seconds, then slowly exhaled. She was in the middle of repeating the process when the lift stopped and Ensign Ro stepped on.

“Everything okay, Lieutenant?” she asked, before requesting the deck she required.

“Frustrated,” Faith told her. “The away team is dealing with the jerk who was responsible for my kidnapping and I have to just…”

“Stay behind?” Ro offered. When Faith nodded, she shook her head and made a noise of disgust. “I’d be wound up too if it were me.”

“I know as Starfleet officers we can’t take things personally but this is personal.”

“It doesn’t get more personal than holding you against your will based on who you’re involved with.”

Faith wasn’t surprised Ro had some knowledge of the situation considering her position on the Bridge. It made sense that she would have overheard and witnessed enough to get the gist of things. In all honesty, it felt nice to hear the perspective of someone who wasn’t a senior officer. There was a deeper sense of camaraderie there from someone who was in a similar position as she was: there but not necessarily on the inside. 

“There was evidence that it was more than that, that I was the focal point as well,” Faith said.

Ro’s eyebrows shot up. “Seriously?” When Faith nodded, she asked, “What kind of evidence?” 

By now the lift had reached Engineering and though Ro was headed to a different floor, she followed Faith to continue the conversation. 

“Photos. Lots of photos of me and me and Data around the ship.”

Ro crossed her arms as if to hug herself. “That’s vile. God, now I wish I went on the away mission too to punch the guy myself.”

“Aww, Ro, you care.”

She rolled her eyes but Faith saw a slight flush in her cheeks. “I hate bullies,” she clarified. “And I hate those who prey on others. Yeah, there’s a risk that comes with being on a starship but we should be able to go about our business without being stalked but some unknown entity.”

“You would think, right?”

“I will say this, you’re handling it a lot better than I would be.”

“Oh, this is all a façade. Inside, I am running around in circles screaming.”

To her surprise, Ro snorted with laughter. “Fantastic mental image.”

Just outside of Engineering, they came to a stop. “This is my stop,” Faith said. 

Ro nodded but as Faith made a move towards the door, she said, “Hey, if they’re not back by the end of your shift. Let’s get a drink. You shouldn’t have to be alone while you wait.”

Faith smiled graciously. “Yeah, okay, I’d like that.”

They parted ways and Faith took her place in Engineering. With all the staff back on hand, there was a fair amount of coordinating that needed to be done, including assignments for new crew members. She did the best she could to throw herself into the work. Yet, her mind kept drifting, wondering if they had encountered Konro yet and if the disguises had worked. Had the transmitters gotten the work done? Were they able to fool the escort enough to even get to the planet?

It wasn’t long before the questions became too overwhelming. Faith was at her desk when an idea struck that sent her to her feet. She marched through Engineering nearly running into Barclay.

“Lieutenant, everything okay?” he asked.

“Everything’s fine. Standby to reroute controls to the Bridge.”

“Yes, sir.”

Faith took the turbo-lift with determination. Just because she couldn’t go on the mission didn’t mean she couldn’t still help. When she stepped off the lift, Captain Picard turned to look at her, eyebrows drawn together in concern.

“Can I help you, Lieutenant Diaz?” he asked. 

“Permission to assist in monitoring the away mission with you, sir,” she said, standing at attention. “My knowledge in this matter could be of assistance and having built the transmitters, I can step in to troubleshoot should there be any issues.”

It was silent enough to hear a pin drop. Worf stood at his tactical station and when she caught his eye, she couldn’t help but think she saw a glimmer of pride. The captain studied her for a moment and then, to her relief, he nodded. 

“Permission granted. You may take this seat,” he ordered, motioning to the chair Deanna usually occupied. 

Exhaling slowly, Faith’s legs felt like jelly as she crossed to the chair. As she sat, she saw Ro at the helm. The young woman nodded with approval and smirked as she turned back to her work. 

Faith hit the com panel on her chair, “Diaz to Engineering, reroute controls to this console.”

“Understood, Lieutenant. Controls rerouted,” Barclay’s voice came through.

Faith turned to Picard. “Has the team made contact?”

“Yes, a few minutes ago. They are on their way to Obara now. We won’t follow until we’re out of sensor range of their escort.”

It was Faith’s turn to nod. She brought up the transmitter readouts so that she could monitor in real time. As terrifying as it was to be on the Bridge, she found it was a lot quieter than Engineering. Then again, it was also way more tense. 

Worf’s terminal beeped. “Sir, the shuttle has landed outside of Konro’s compound.”

“Acknowledged,” Picard responded. 

Faith reached into her pocket to touch Data’s com badge. She hated that she had to take it from him while the others could keep theirs, as they could hide them better and wouldn’t be searched as thoroughly. Touching the cool metal though gave her an idea.

“Captain, I can reconfigure the away team’s com badges from here to listen in on their conversation once we’re in range,” she suggested. “That way we can hear what is happening. It’ll take a couple of minutes but it’ll give us some idea of what’s going on.”

“Do it.”

Faith used her access to set up a subroutine that would remotely turn on the com badge's microphone. It wasn’t a difficult feat comparatively, however, the fact that she sat right next to the captain did lay on the pressure. She could feel the sweat dripping down the back of her neck and under her collar. 

Come on, you can do this in your sleep, she told herself. Just focus.

“They are out of sensor range,” Worf announced.

“Ensign, take us in, warp three. Once we’re out, use impulse only to get us as close to the planet as possible without going into standard orbit.”

“Aye, sir,” Ro responded. “Warp three, engaged.”

Faith kept working and by the time they were in position, she managed her goal. A moment later, Riker’s voice came through to the Bridge.

“Come now, Dulcer, Enil. Let’s not leave our benefactor waiting.”

Faith couldn’t help the small triumphant grin on her face.

“And you’re sure the android will be safe there until Mr. Konro can examine him?” Deanna asked, doing an excellent imitation of Dulcer.

“Of course. Mr. Konro is diligent when it comes to security. Nothing comes in or out without his knowledge and he only hires the best.”

“He’ll be fine,” Riker assured them. “I have complete trust in our benefactor.”

The silence on the Bridge was tense as they listened to the group move throughout the compound to where Konro waited for them. Faith’s body was tight and her shoulders were nearly by her ears as the moments ticked by. There was the swish of a door and they heard Konro’s voice for the first time.

“Well, well, well. To what do I owe the honor of this visit?”

“Vorbos Konro, I presume? We are the delegates from Vangar and have delivered what Fajo failed to,” Riker said.

“So I’ve been told. And am I to presume you did this purely out of the goodness of your hearts?”

“I wouldn’t go that far. There is much to discuss.”

“I agree. Please, have a seat. Doran, go gather refreshments.”

His aid didn’t speak as he left but the swish of the doors signaled his exit. There was a beat of silence where Faith imagined Konro taking the other three in.

“I have to say, I was surprised to get your message,” he said.

“I’m sure,” Riker responded. “To be honest, we’ve always found Fajo to be rather short-sighted. More concerned for his collection rather than the bigger picture.”

“Oh? And what do you think the bigger picture is?”

“Let’s not beat around the bush,” Geordi spoke up. “We have something that you want and something you need, just as you have something we want and need.”

“Direct. I heard that about you, Enil.”

“And we heard you have a lot of pull in this region.”

“You could say that.”

“I’m sure you’re aware of the Vangar’s seclusion,” Deanna said. “We choose our friends very carefully.”

“Are you saying we’re friends?”

“We could be,” Riker said. “For the right price.”

“I’m intrigued. Although, one android is hardly a reason for us to become friends.”

“It’s not just the android we bring. As your aid can confirm, we also have a cloaking device. Not Romulan or Klingon. Something entirely different, another gift from Fajo.”

“Who knew it would be so generous after his death?”

“Imagine that.”

Faith fidgeted in her seat, incredibly uncomfortable with the entire exchange. it didn’t sit right with her, not that anything that was happening did. She realized she had drawn the captain’s attention with her movements and leaned closer to him so she could quietly ask, “Do you find it strange he hasn’t said a thing about Data? Hasn’t asked about him at all?”

Picard’s face echoed her concern. “I was thinking the same thing,” he responded.

The unease she felt earlier only increased. It took everything to stop fidgeting. Instead, she busied herself with the terminal, quietly checking on Konro’s defenses. They were strong, yet not as strong as she would have expected. She was able to pick up the signal from their coms and their sensors could pick up the life forms surrounding them, but that was it for now.

“Can you get a lock on them, Mr. Worf?” Picard asked. 

“Not yet,” Worf answered. “But we can track them for now.”

“Captain, I can try to see if I can break into Konro’s systems from here,” Faith said. “But I’m unsure of his fail-safes. Considering what happened to the Enterprise when Data tried to decrypt the files…”

“Hold off,” Picard ordered. “We’ll wait for Mr. Data to try on his end.”

“I will admit, I’m intrigued,” Konro told them. “But, first things first, how did you know Fajo was working for me? It wasn’t exactly public knowledge.”

“You know how Fajo is. Once he’s proud of something you’ll never stop hearing about it,” Riker said. “We were introduced to the android during a dinner. Fajo hinted he had help and after that, it didn’t take much to get him to reveal more.”

“And his death? What do you know of that?”

“A testament to the android’s strength. I wouldn’t advise making him angry.”

“He has feelings? It was my understanding that wasn’t the case.”

“We were told that as well, and yet, he beat Fajo within an inch of his life. One doesn’t do that unless it’s personal.”

“Curious. Very curious.”

There was nothing in Konro’s tone or words that he had the obsession with Data as the information had led them to believe. His words seemed cold and unattached, almost like he was speaking from a script. 

“Something’s not right,” Faith said out loud. “This doesn’t feel right.”

“I’m inclined to agree,” Picard said. “I get the distinct impression that he’s putting on a show.”

“Are we sure this is actually Konro?”

“We can’t be sure of anything at this point, Lieutenant.”

Through the coms came the sudden sounding of an alarm which sent Faith’s blood pressure through the roof. 

Konro’s aid came into the room a second later. “Sir, there’s a security breach! The android is loose!” he exclaimed.

“So, this is your idea of friendship?” Konro snapped at the others.

“Hey, we deactivated him long ago and stored him where your aid told us to,” Riker snapped back. “Your place is supposed to be secure. If he escaped, that’s on you.”

“Seal off the exits and start sweeping each floor and turbo-lift! I want the android caught! As for you three—”

Interference cut the connection without warning and Faith tried desperately to get it back. There was static and then nothing, only the erratic beeping of the com pad she quickly tapped on. 

“What’s happening?” Picard demanded. 

“I don’t know, some kind of interference. I’m trying to compensate.”

“Have we got a lock on them yet?”

“Aye, sir,” Worf assured him. “However, I am picking up many other signatures throughout the compound.”

“What about Commander Data’s?” 

“It’s going to take some time to narrow it down.”

Faith was able to reestablish the connection  just as Riker’s voice said, “Riker to Enterprise.”

“We’re here, Number One,” Picard responded. “What’s happening down there?”

“Konro has locked us in a room and then he went off to find out what’s happening.”

Just then, Faith saw the Vangar ship downloading information and she realized that Data had gotten to a console. “Sir, Data’s made the connection!” she announced. “We’re downloading Konro’s computer contents now.”

“Monitor it and make sure the transfer goes through!” Picard ordered. “Number One, you need to find Data so we can beam you all out of there. We haven’t got a lock on his signature.”

“Geordi is trying to get us out now, but—”

“I got you,” Faith interrupted, using the connection to access Konro’s entire system. “Just give me a second to find the right room and…”

“The door’s open, we’re out!”

Picard glanced over at Faith with a smile. “Thank you, Lieutenant. Start going through those files.”

“Yes, sir.”

Faith needed a bigger console so she transferred the access to Engineering Station One and immediately sat down at it. She got to work strengthening the connection with the hope of downloading things faster. Once that was established, she went through some of the information.

It was a plethora of criminal activity. Trade agreements with the Ferengi to dark dealings with some Romulans. She saw a couple of files regarding the Federation but it was going to take time to thoroughly go through them all. Either way, it was a start to what they had been looking for. 

"It looks like we got more than enough," she reported. "It's going to take time to sort through it all but from what I see, Konro has a lot to answer for. I've found several of the correspondences that match Fajo's. He's definitely the one that sent Fajo after Data."

"Good! Mr. Worf, I want them out of there the second they find Data."

There was a moment when it looked like someone was trying to shut down the connection but Faith had ample warning thanks to the way she boosted the link. In the back of her mind, she was concerned that the shutdown could mean Data was found out. However, she couldn’t let that stand in her way. She bypassed their orders yet made it appear the shutdown had worked, which could only fool them for so long. Hopefully, it would be long enough.

“Number One, what’s going on down there?” Picard asked, the tenseness in his voice echoing the tension blanketed throughout the Bridge.

“Heavy resistance,” Riker responded, sounding out of breath over the sound of phaser fire. 

“Sir, someone tried to shut down the connection so we should assume Data is incapacitated,” Faith told the captain. 

“Did you hear that, Commander?”

“Yeah, I heard. We’re on it."

Faith stood at the console, every muscle tight as they waited, and waited, and waited. She busied herself with the progress bar, watching the percentage climb higher until it flashed one word: complete.

A second later, Geordi’s voice sounded through the com. “We got him,” he said. “Looks like they deactivated him and took him to some sort of lab. Transporter, lock on to our signals. Four to beam up.”

Faith slowly exhaled and shared a look of relief with Worf. A second later, he nodded to the captain, “They’re on board.”

“Ensign Ro, take us to the nearest Federation starbase, maximum warp!” barked Picard. 

Faith watched the view screen warp and the planet faded into blackness. Only then did she let out a slow exhale. Turning to the captain she asked, “Permission to leave, Captain?”

Picard nodded. “Granted. I’ll come with you. Mr. Worf, you have the Bridge.”

Together he and Faith rode the turbo-lift to transporter room two. It felt like it took forever, like the lift was taking its sweet time getting them to where they wanted to go. Finally, the doors opened, and they were met with Riker, Deanna, Geordi, and Data coming down the hall. They must have reactivated Data as soon as they found him.

As much as she wanted to throw herself into his arms, she restrained herself. “I’m so glad you’re okay,” she told him when they finally met in the hall. 

He smiled. “As am I.” Turning to Picard, he said, “I was able to establish a link with Konro’s computer to our systems before I was deactivated. I am unsure if the link was severed afterward.”

“No, it wasn’t, thanks to Lieutenant Diaz,” Picard told him. “We received all the information and preliminary searches found plenty of incriminating evidence. What went wrong?”

“Once it was discovered I was missing, security sounded an alarm,” Data explained. “I avoided them as much as possible but it was difficult once I accessed the main computer. Someone came up behind me and deactivated me. I did not see who it was.”

“That place was crawling with security,” Riker explained. “We barely got out of there in time.”

“Another minute and we would have been overrun,” Deanna said.

Picard nodded in understanding. “Well done, all of you. We’ll reconvene in the morning and you can give me your full report. By then, we should have more information on Konro’s files. Get some rest, you’ve earned it.”

“I need to get these damn prosthetics off, I’m going crazy,” Geordi said, pulling at the fake facial unit.

“Agreed,” Riker and Deanna said at the same time.

They headed in the direction of Sickbay as Picard returned to the Bridge, leaving Data and Faith alone. The moment they were, she threw her arms around his neck and hugged him tight. His arms came around her waist, gently returning the hug.

“I was so worried about you,” she whispered.

“There is no need to worry. I am fine.”

She had gotten so used to his new emotional state that it surprised her to find him so subdued. She gathered he was as exhausted as the others and probably hungry too. Not to mention, they were standing in the middle of the hallway where anyone could happen upon them. 

“Let’s go to our quarters,” she suggested, pulling away and taking his hand. “You can tell me all about what happened.”

“I would like that very much.”

Smiling, she pulled him in the right direction, eternally grateful that the nightmare was finally over. They didn’t have to worry about Konro anymore. He was finally going to be in custody and she and Data would be able to breathe.

As soon as they were inside, Faith turned to Data, cupped his chin, and pulled him into a kiss. It took a second for him to respond, but once he did he all but knocked her back from the force. It hurt more than anything else and Faith jerked away in response. His arm came around her waist to hold her in place when she pushed on his chest. 

“Ow, watch it,” she said. “There’s a difference between pleasure and pain, babe.”

“My apologies. I did not intend to hurt you, only show my appreciation.”

“It’s okay."

She ran her hands up his arms to rest on his shoulder, pushing herself up on tiptoes to kiss him again. His response was much gentler yet, still felt off. Almost like he didn’t quite know what to do with his mouth at first. His teeth roughly nipped her bottom lip and she drew back with a frown. 

"Are you alright?"

"Yes, I am fine. Why do you ask?"

"I don't know, you seem…" She shook the thought away, not wanting to spoil the mood. "Sorry, ignore me. We’ve both been on edge about this whole thing. I’m just relieved you’re back.”

There was something about how he studied her that made her uneasy. His gaze was intense in a way she couldn’t describe, not quite what it used to be before Q’s intervention and definitely not what it’s been like in the last few days.

“Are you sure you're alright?” she asked. “You seem…off.”

“Do I?” 

Faith nodded, detaching herself from his embrace. “Did something happen while you were down there?”

“Nothing out of the ordinary. It was a successful mission and I am glad we were able to receive the information we required. I believe I am still processing that this ordeal is finally over.”

Brushing the feelings off again as her annoying anxiety, she suggested, “Let’s get some dinner and unwind.”

When she took a step towards the replicator, Data took her hand. “Faith, before we continue, I feel as though we should have a discussion.”

A stab of fear sparked through her nervous system like an electrical current and she suddenly found her mouth dry. “Okay,” she said in a soft voice. It wasn’t just the words that made her worried but the way he said them, the carefulness of his tone.

He led her to the couch where they sat, side by side. His expression was one of sympathy which didn’t help her rattled nerves. “I have come to a decision that needs to be addressed sooner rather than later,” he said, taking both her hands in his. "I believe we should end our relationship."

Faith blinked. For a second she thought she imagined what he said but when he continued to stare at her with that blank expression, she realized she hadn't.

"Are…are you serious?"

Data nodded solemnly. "Yes. I believe it is the right course of action."

"What are you talking about? Where is this coming from?"

"I have given it a fair amount of thought and after everything I have put you through, I cannot continue to put your life in danger."

"Data, you haven't put me through anything. None of this is your fault." She reached out to cradle his face. "You know I love you. I don't blame you for this."

He gently took her hands away. "It is not only this situation. We both know I will never be human and cannot give you everything you want, especially the love you feel for me. It would be unwise for me to continue this relationship knowing, in the end, you will be hurt."

Faith was dumbfounded. She was beyond shocked. The words were coming out of Data's mouth and yet they didn't sound like him at all. What the hell was he talking about? Hadn’t they just discovered that he did indeed love her and that what he was feeling had been genuine? This wasn't how this was supposed to go. Why would he break up with her now, when they finally figure out who had been stalking them for months?

Did he see something when he was down there that changed his mind? Was Konro not the culprit and Data was still trying to protect her?

"Data, I don't understand why you're saying this," she told him, getting to her feet. She needed to move, needed to pace as she sorted out her feelings. "I thought we had talked things out before you left. What you're saying to me now doesn't make any sense!"

“I’m sorry to have caused you pain, please know this decision was quite difficult.”

She froze in her tracks, her ears instantly registering what her nerves had been trying to convey since the second the turbo-lift doors opened. Ever so slowly, she turned to look back at him.

“What did you say?”

“I said, I am sorry to have caused you pain—”

She cut him off. “No, you didn’t. You said ‘I’m’ not ‘I am’.”

There was a beat of silence and though his expression never changed, the air around him did. It was suddenly thick, almost enough to choke on. 

“I believe in your agitated state you must have misheard,” Data insisted as he stood up. “Perhaps I should escort you to Counselor Troi.”

When he reached for her, she slapped his hands away and backed up. “Don’t fucking touch me!” she barked. “Who are you?”

Data cocked his head, only this time she didn’t find it the least bit endearing. “I am Data.”

Faith shook her head so hard, her hair started to loosen from its braid. “No, no you’re not. Data wouldn’t break up with me, not that way.”

“I understand that it might be difficult for you to accept my decision but my calculations have determined it is the right one for both of us.”

“Oh, really, your calculations told you that?”

Though he continued to take steps in her direction, she kept her distance, putting as much space between them as possible. She was one-hundred percent certain whoever she was looking at was not the man she loved. Setting aside the fact that he couldn’t do his calculations at the moment, he hadn’t shown an ounce of emotion the entire time he’d been back.

There was one final test. 

“What do you call me?” she demanded.

“Faith, you are starting to sound hysterical. I am sure Dr. Crusher or Counselor Troi can help.”

“Answer the fucking question! What do you call me?”

“I call you Faith.”

“And what else? What term of endearment?”

There was a pause, which was all she needed. 

“I do not feel it is appropriate to use such a name given the termination of our relationship,” “Data” said. “I really think you should go see the doctor.”

“And I think you should stop fucking lying to me! Data would fucking know the nickname he gave me and he wouldn’t gaslight me!”

She was almost to the door. If she backed up a little bit more she would be there. Unfortunately, whoever it was that stood before her noticed that fact as well. In the blink of an eye, he charged and she immediately reached for her com badge as she bolted from him. 

“Securi—!”

Seized from behind, a hand slammed over her mouth leaving her in the grips of android strength that was familiar, yet clearly didn’t belong to Data. The badge was ripped from her chest and tossed across the room, disappearing into the closet. 

“Well, well, well,” said a voice filled with amused malice. “You’re a lot smarter than I gave you credit for. My brother sure knows how to pick ‘em.” 

Cold realization crashed over Faith like a tidal wave and she felt the bile rise in her throat. Every instinct told her to fight but she heard Worf’s voice in her head. 

He knows you’re going to struggle so don’t give him what he wants.

So she didn’t fight back, because she knew it was pointless. Even with the basics of training, she was no match for his strength. Instead, she jerked her head and tugged his hand away from her mouth.

“Lore I presume?” she asked.

Lore gave her a dark chuckle and pressed his cheek to hers. “Aww, so he has mentioned me. How sweet. I bet you two have shared many intimate moments and conversations over the last few months,” he said gleefully. “I gotta say, when I first started keeping tabs on my brother, I never imagined I’d find him shacking up with someone. That was a pretty big surprise.”

Faith found herself spun around, giving her a chance to look her attacker in the eye. Seeing such a dark expression on Data’s face was disturbing enough, yet there was something more. The way he gazed at her chilled her right down to her bones. 

“It made me very curious about you,” he continued. He reached up to push her bangs back from her face, caressing her cheek as his hand drifted away. Once more, she jerked her head, gritting her teeth at the unwanted touch. “Who is this person who decided an emotionless android was the ideal life partner? She must really love to torture herself or really hates herself. Probably both.”

“Where’s Data?” she demanded. 

Lore pouted. “‘Where’s Data?’” he mocked. In a blink, he bared his teeth and tightened his hold on her. “What is it about him that makes everyone flock to him? He can’t feel anything! He can’t return the love that everyone throws at his feet! I get disassembled and shot into space while he gets accolades and…”

He suddenly paused and spasmed as if jolted by an invisible force. With a gasp he shut his eyes, seemingly relishing in whatever he was feeling. When he looked at her again, he was smiling.

“But we’ll talk more about that later,” he said, securing her to his side with only one arm as he freed the other. “You and I, we have a ship to catch. We’re going on a little trip, someplace where we can get to know each other better.”

“I’m not fucking going anywhere with you!”

“Mmm, feisty. I think I kind of like that.” He reached out to bend his nail back, exposing flashing lights and a small button. “Sorry, sweetheart, you don’t have a choice.”

Faith knew she had only seconds to act while Lore’s hands were busy. Using his weight against him, she suddenly threw herself backward, sending them both crashing through the coffee table. Lore was taken off guard just enough for her to slip out of his grasp. 

Scrambling for the door, she yelled, “Computer, intruder alert!”

An alarm sounded and a second later, Lore dive-tackled her to the ground. Faith did her best to fight him off, desperately reaching for something, anything to hit him with. 

A loud hiss and a ball of fur darted out from under the bed, latching onto Lore’s face. It was the chance Faith needed to free herself. Stumbling, she made it to the doors which automatically opened. For the briefest moment, she thought she was going to make it. 

A yelp from Spot was followed by a growl from Lore which tore that hope away. They slammed into the wall as he grabbed her again. Faith’s temple struck a console and stars exploded before her eyes. Through them, she barely had a second to notice Lieutenant Worf before she felt the pull of a transporter. She reached for him as he dove for her, but it was too late.

The halls of the Enterprise faded into swirling lights as she was pulled into the unknown.

[shibalen]

♡︎ 𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒄𝒉𝒖𝒑 𝒇𝒐𝒓 @fallaciousjustice

i match you with . . .

𝑱𝑰𝑹𝑶 𝑲𝒀𝑶𝑲𝑨 !!

omg the coolest pair on the block, where can I get you guys' charisma??

Right from the get-go Jiro would love your sense of fashion + the sunglasses and gloves. She thinks they match your vibe perfectly. Paired with your confidence and honesty, you're as perfect as a human being can get.

Jiro herself is quite bold too which fits well with your values. There is freedom in having someone you can be 100% honest with and not worry about them taking it personally.

Both of you appreciate that in each other, so you have a lot of common ground. Get in the car, it's ride or die with you guys all the way!

I can imagine all the sass and sarcastic jokes you share would be top quality *mwah* not to mention relentlessly teasing each other and everybody else around you. I fear for the poor soul Denki who becomes your next target.

Your natural talent in problem-solving and unique perspectives intrigue her! She asks for your opinions whenever she has trouble understanding something and you never fail to give an eye-opening answer.

As a streak of contrast, however, Jiro is a very chill person, even coming off as indifferent, so your enthusiasm and the way you present youself is endearing to her. You're quick to change the atmosphere which leaves her amazed and wishing she at times could take a page from your book.

Though she carries herself with self-assurance, Jiro is sometimes reluctant to show her sensitive side. So, you help her be more confident and letting that part of her shine more often ♡︎

On the other hand, she saves you from awkward social situations when the cues might not reach you. She honestly thinks it's hilarious but it's also one of the things she likes about you. It's refreshing not to go with the flow every now and then after all.

She is also very good at putting your mind at ease if it happens to be running overdrive. May give you a gentle zap to remind you that your ideas are fine and there's no need to second-guess yourself.

You also match energies when it comes to being creative. Although Jiro focuses on music, she thinks it's super cool you're into creative writing and art and would gladly indulge in them with you. They might even inspire her in songwriting?

That said, she loves playing music together: you with the ukulele and she with her acoustic guitar. It would be for your ears only, your private little pastime. And if you're interested, she can teach you another instrument (secretly actually anticipating when you would ask—)

The good old height difference™ You can make fun of her for her shortness, just know its your kneecaps on the line and that she's not afraid to get you back with an equally mean joke.

Overall your dynamic has such style and charm! Beneath the playful teasing and chill vibes a solid bond of loyalty and mutual understanding ties you and Jiro together ♡

♡ 𝑴𝑬𝑬𝑻𝑰𝑵𝑮

You were out doing some clothes shopping a few days before the UA entrance exam. You were quite confident you would get in, now all you needed were some new clothes to be ready for a refreshing beginning.

Out in the open markets there were many things that caught your attention, but one particular accessory stuck out: a silver bracelet that would go perfectly with a shirt you bought earlier.

Just as you reached for it, however, another hand did the same. You looked up to find a pair of obsidian eyes starting right back at you. After a moment of suprise, a playful, competitive smile lazily stretched across her face.

"Sorry but I think I was about to get it first."

"Are you sure about that?"

You regarded each other steadily, both knowing what it was like to compete over limited merchandise. The one who offers the most wins.

Yet once again you got interrupted as a passing stranger snatched the bracelet from right underneath your eyes and broke into a sprint. How very bold of that guy.

Neither you nor the girl were willing to let the thief get off easy it seemed, both of you chasing after them before making a quick job of capturing them with your quirks.

When you returned the bracelet to the stall, she said you should have it because you were quicker to react than she was. The sellsman even let you have it for free despite that you were willing to pay for it!

You didn't introduce yourselves back then but on the next day when you met again at the UA entrance exam it was almost the first thing you did. The coincidence was just too funny.

After the exams and getting into the academy you hung out a lot with Jiro, and she really enjoyed your company, especially since sometimes the rest of the class could really be over-the-top (¯∇¯٥)

A good relationship starting with a strong friendship ♡︎

♡︎ 𝑩𝑳𝑼𝑹𝑩𝑺

So many fun and creative dates! It's never a boring moment with you. Jiro especially enjoys taking you to concerts (only if your sensory issues allow it) and music shops. But also just chilling together playing songs or writing is perfectly fine with her cause you're both introverted.

At first she didn't understand much about hockey but after you invited her out to play one winter evening she got surprisingly into it!

Now she joins you when you go to watch games and gets super hyped (though she is shy in showing it you can see her excitement clear as day heheh). Also cheers you on whenever you yourself are playing ♡︎

Coffee shops!! Either for studying or just chill dates. Often the Bakusquad joins you even if you didn't necessarily invite them along.

Jiro: "I'd like my coffee how I like my soul."

You: "Two extra sugars and whipped cream, please."

She has all your favourite coffee orders memorised and surprises you with them every now and then! Also takes note of whenever you have your eye on a certain art supply or piece of clothing so she could get you some of them as gifts (´,,•ω•,,)

Horror movie nights is a regular thing on weekends: you bring the best movie and Jiro supplies the snacks.

It's funny to observe how she subconsciously scoots closer to you when a more intense scene is playing. If anyone else would ask if she's spooked she'd say no but since it's you she'll admit it (but only a little!)

Yet haunted houses (real or organised) are completely fine?? When you get excited to go to one it's always so fun watching you get into the eerie mood. Probably has tried to sneak up on you to to see your reaction ๛ก(ｰ̀ωｰ́ก)

Jiro thinks your eyes are the prettiest things she has ever seen. Of course she never pesters you to take off your sunglasses but if you happen to, don't be surprised if she stares at you for a moment too long.

Probably not a lot of pda between you but cuddles in private are the comfiest! Just randomly lounging on top of each other or tucked in the arms of each other while doing your own thing or maybe brainstorming for plots and music~

𑁍 𝑱𝑬𝑾𝑬𝑳𝑳𝑬𝑹𝒀 𝑩𝑶𝑿

— favourite memory with you

The time when you wrote your first song together and played it. It started out as something not as serious, since you only jokingly asked her one day what kind background music would fit a certain scene you wrote for a story. After not finding anything online, Jiro started thinking about it harder and began writing down melodies. Then you pitched in your own ideas and eventually you had a whole theme for your story :0 It kinda became your themesong as well. The sentation of having created something together was just so incredibly thrilling and deepened your relationship even further. It was also the first time Jiro admitted to herself she had a crush on you. Your brilliant smile, your harmonious laughter when you thanked her—yep, she had it down bad . . .

— favourite place to kiss you

Classic cheek kisses because there she can actually reach you and it's just very wholesome anyway ♡ Also the back of your hand when you don't have gloves on since it is so rare and she's kinda smug about being one of the few people to be able to hold your hands like this.

— favourite nicknames to call you by

Ever since your first meeting she thinks the nickname Justice does fit you quite well. It's very playful and familiar so she often uses it as a greeting or a way to get your attention. She also likes silly ones like different marvel hero names considering how popular you are and how quick you are to jump into action. Maybe 'babe' on some special occasions :))

♫︎ 𝑴𝑼𝑺𝑰𝑪 𝑩𝑶𝑿

— Rhinestone Eyes by Gorillaz

— Mariposa by peach tree rascals (acoustic)

— Supermassive Black Hole by Muse

— Death Bed by Powfu ft. beabadoobee

— How Deep Is Your Love by Reneé Dominique (cover)

♡ runner up: Bakugo Katsuki

note: Hi! Here we are, thank you for being patient with me <33 I read from your profile that you're not active here much anymore but I hope you still log in one day and see this. Hopefully you are doing well and taking care of yourself!!

[pinguuu-ni]

Going to add to this as well, being from a different area.

My whole life until pretty recently I've been hitting 120, using prev's analogy.

In all honesty, looking back, I was miserable during ny teenage years because my teachers and my father would make me feel bad for achieving anything less than "perfection", let alone the thought of ever slowing things down.

Fast forward and now I'm almost 24 and in my final year of medical school. In the medical field there's the idea that's imposed to you from your formative years that if you don't give your 101% to your career and to your patients, you don't belong there, and this idea shapes you and lingers all through your practice.

During the first 3 years I somehow managed to go 120, until around 3 years ago I crashed and burnt, and I got insecure about my choice because I thought that really, if I couldn't handle giving it my all the whole time during my formation there was no way I would be able to do it in the professional setting.

After some months of hitting my head on the wall and beating around the bush, I told my parents I needed to temporarily stop for my mental health. My mom, as always, supported me, my father on the other way had the nerve to tell me to my face, disregarding the fact that I was crying every day, couldn't get up from my bed and was even losing weight, that I should just suck it up and keep going . There was no way I could keep going, and honestly, I'm so glad that for the first time I managed to stand up for myself.

I stopped for about a year, and during that time I (re)discovered some hobbies, read a lot, went to a lot of places, and slowly, very slowly, got myself replenished. It was a very hard process, but it thaught me one of the most important things so far in my life - there is nothing more important than yourself, your physical and mental health. These are the only things you should give your 100% to.

I returned to school but now I sure as hell am not going 120, maybe around 70 or 80.

School, work, social responsibilities in general are important as well of course, but they won't amount to anything if you are not okay.

"half-assing" is a terrible expression because it carries such a negative connotation that you for sure won't want to "half-ass" things.

Shift your perspective.

You give what you can to your responsibilities - let's say I'll give 75% to school/ my job. I'll give the 100% of that 75%, how is that half-assing?

[aemenvs3000w24]

My Thoughts on Nature Interpretation

One of my favourite quotes of all time is “With great power comes great responsibility”. Now I know you usually hear this quote in the movies, when a leader is making a tough choice or the protagonist is analyzing their options, but I like to think about this quote on a day-to-day basis. Although nature interpretation may not be seen as a “power”, it is important to acknowledge the influence of our actions and interpretations on others. Because of this, my biggest belief in nature interpretation is to be honest. Interpreting with honesty allows for more meaningful perspectives, both for yourself and your observers. It also allows you to build trust in your relationship with nature. There is no point in lying to yourself about your opinions on nature because it does not provide any benefit to anyone. As mentioned in Chapter 4, when delivering interpretations, it is crucial to be clear and honest, only with the exception of if the truth could be seen as a threat to others (Knudson et al., 2018). Analyzing your surroundings when outside in a truthful manner encourages reflection and allows individuals to find resources in nature that can be used. I also believe that all interpreters should go into any scenario with an open mind. Having preconceived ideas going into a situation ruins the chance you have to make the interpretation your own. A huge part of this is acknowledging your biases before you approach your interpretive scenario. Biases can be formed based on background, opinion or preference and they can cause you to judge or exclude pieces of nature because of these feelings. Putting these aside allows you to interpret the entire scenario. 

When interpreting nature, I believe that it is everyone's responsibility to be respectful of our surroundings. When camping as a child, I was often told the saying “leave only footprints, take only memories”. This attitude needs to be used in nature interpretation, to be respectful of how our presence is affecting the ecosystem. Not only will this assist with the strength of our own interpretations, but it will prevent the chance of impacting the experience of future interpreters. Someone's experience in an area filled with litter and man-made impact is going to be very different from the experience of someone in a carefully conserved area. Nature has a natural cycle that makes it work the way that it does, and messing with that could have drastic consequences. Ensuring our presence is not impacting the environmental wellness of an area is very important. 

It's also our responsibility as a nature interpreter to step outside your comfort zone. Similar to biases, continuously going into familiar scenarios will prevent growth as a nature interpreter. Resisting change will only limit the amount of productivity and discovery you can have when in nature. Chapter 7 of the textbook includes several examples of individuals admitting to wanting to stay in their comfort zone in different scenarios, but proving that they only really thrived in their area when they tried something new (Knudson et al., 2018). It can be scary to step outside the box, but as an interpreter it is our responsibility to do so in order to make our most educated and adapted responses. 

An approach to nature interpretation that has benefitted me the most is being patient. I have learned that there is no rush, and that it takes time to fully take in my surroundings to develop my opinion. Rushing can lead to mistakes or misinterpretations. In order to properly interpret something, you need to give yourself the time to ask and answer questions from concepts directly related to Maslow's hierarchy, beginning general and then expanding to narrower concepts (Knudson et al., 2018). Addressing all layers of a scenario takes time, but doing so pays off with better understood interpretations. I feel more people just need to slow down to look around. Similarly, it is equally important to revisit or re-evaluate scenarios if necessary, in order to get the best interpretations. Interpreting in one go can be hard to gain the full picture, so revisiting an experience or area can help gain more perspective.

My biggest take away from this course in nature interpretation approaches is how transdisciplinary the skills and resources I have gained through my nature interpretation are. Each of the factors I just listed can be applied to my day to day life, whether it's interacting with people or making decisions. Being open, respectful, cautious and patient can prevent unintentional emotions or interactions with others. Additionally, all these skills will also be extremely transferable in future employment scenarios. For example, I can use my patience skills when I start a new job and am learning how to take on responsibilities. Or I can use my experience in maintaining respectful interactions to speak with future supervisors. Starting in a calm and private area like nature to gain these skills results in having these tools ready when you need them in the future. This again just shows how closely related our world and nature are, and how we can learn from our surroundings.

Ultimately, I believe that ethics in nature interpretation is extremely personal and changes based on an individual's expression. The priorities someone has in their natural explorations are based on so many independent factors that can not be uniformly defined by a certain set of ethics. If there is one thing I have learned in this course, and I've said it before many times, it's that nature interpretation is all about perspective. 

Thanks for a great semester!

Knudson, D. M., Beck, L., Cable, T. T. (2018). Interpreting Cultural and Natural Heritage: For a Better World. Sagamore Publishing LLC. https://sagamore.vitalsource.com/books/9781571678669

[storyunrelated]

Bad Dreams - Part Two

While inflation was occurring Rose called upon me to assist in wrangling the basket we would apparently be clambering into and ascending in shortly. Again, what we pulled it out of was in no-way the right size to have contained it in the first place but meh, we’re over that.  The basket itself seemed a bit flimsy to me, in all honesty, but I trusted Rose and so made no mention of this. 

Besides, if I plummeted to my death she probably would too, so it’d work out.

Thus, with basket set up with sandbags and such and balloon lashed to basket and glowing cube seeing the balloon full and plump we were, apparently, ready to go. Who knew it could be so easy? Certainly not me.

Learn something new every day.

I stood admiring our handiwork while Rose continued to fiddle. Most of magic seemed to involve a lot of fiddling, or maybe it was just a habit of witches. I didn’t know any others so couldn’t say for sure.

It was a bag she was fiddling with this time. A very handsome leather over-the-shoulder affair. Messenger bag? 

Out of this bag she pulled what looked to be a pair of opera glasses. I’m not sure how I know what opera glasses are, but I know them when I see them. Like a pair of binoculars on a stick, basically. And what a fine set these were, if a little ostentatious. Lots of brass bits of indeterminate purpose.

Rose passed them to me.

“You’ll need these,” she said.

“I will?”

“Well, yeah. You’re not a witch, you can’t see magic or most magic things and if you want to try and sort this out you’ll need to. So you’ll need these.”

“Righto.”

That’d be me being magically inert again, I guess. We all have our areas of weakness. Rose can’t roll her tongue the way I can, Nisien is colourblind and I’m magically inert and need special glasses to see dreams while hovering in a balloon. 

Such is life. Different strokes and all that.

I gave the glasses a quick experimental peer through and was taken aback. At first I thought maybe something had gone wrong and stopped peering after not even a moment, but on my cautious second attempt I discovered that, no, what I’d seen was apparently what I was supposed to have seen - assuming they were working.

“Are these working?” I asked, wincing, holding the glasses up and looking around at the garden, the balloon, the walls, the sky, the etcetera.

“What are you seeing?” Rose asked.

“Coloured...splotches and...drifting...threads and...wafting...bits of...something?���

It was kind of difficult to describe. 

“Nope, that’s about right,” Rose said.

Maybe not so difficult to describe, then.

“This is how you see all the time?” I asked, aghast, looking at her and finding her practically shining and glowing and generally incandescent, radiant with inner-power amidst a swirl of lesser, uh, somethings.

Words fail me. Not my area of expertise. 

Rose shrugged. Her shoulders shot sparks that headed skywards with abandon.

“Not completely, but close,” she said.

“It’s exhausting,” I said, lowering the glasses and giving my eyes a rub.

And with that in we clambered and up we went, Rose controlling our rise via means of yet more arcane hand gestures administered to her box. Fingering was key, it seemed. Could get a proper rise with the right sort of fingering. 

Hah. Funny.

The view was lovely, but that should go without saying. A lot of people are ambivalent about heights and a lot of people are rather unhappy about them, but I love them. 

Particularly I love them in places you don’t usually get them. High-up views from places where there isn’t really a high-up place to view from, you know? Gives a whole different perspective, tilts whatever grasp you had on the layout of the world to the side, shakes up the way you think things fit together and helps you understand just how tiny you really are.

But that’s me. Point is it’s fun seeing across all these rooftops and all these streets that seem so familiar from down below but so novel and new from up above. And the thrill of knowing that you’re inches from plummeting to your death.

Whee, etcetera.

Still, we were up there on business, such as it was, so there wasn’t any time to waste in sightseeing or cooing over how I could see my house from up here - we had dreams to spy on or whatever. Rose was already getting into that, one hand clutching the lip of the basket and the other coming up to shield her eyes from the last few dribbles of sun, squinting in fierce concentration. 

Not wishing to be outdone I took the other side of the basket, clutched the lip (sensible, really), brought the glasses up and got to squinting, again bamboozled by all the lights and swishy nonsense.

How did witches put up with even a smidgen of this? You can get used to anything, I’m told, but still, it’s a bit much. I’ll take being magically inert, thank you.

Scanning about I did my best to keep an eye out for anything unusual, keenly aware that everything I could see through the glasses was, for me, unusual. With that in mind I tried to dismiss all of that unusual stuff as normal and instead look for the really unusual stuff.

Whatever that was.

Behind me Rose was continuing to do the same thing without the aid of glasses and likely with a lot more success in knowing what was and wasn’t noteworthy and it was while I was thinking how poorly-equipped I was for what we were doing that something actually did catch my eye.

Quickly scanning back to the right - which is where the flicker in the corner of my eye had been - I saw what looked an awful lot like a great deal of bright, shining silver wire being spooled out of a chimney a few streets away. The more I watched the more this continued, the wire just spooling up and up and unwinding in the air and there just hanging, forming an ever-expanding cloud of tangles that was certainly striking.

And, more importantly, looked absolutely like nothing else I’d seen so far, which made it unusual.

Keeping my eyes glued to it lest I lose it I reached back and blindly groped to try and find Rose, managing to lightly tap her on the shoulder after a few false swipes.

“What?” I heard her ask.

“Think I got something here,” I said.

She came in to stand beside me (making the basket wobble a little).

“What?” She asked again. I pointed.

“That thing. Big silver thing, big silver mess over there. Is that something?”

Rose narrowed her eyes, then started muttering quietly to herself as she pulled out that big dream book again and had a quick flick through, glancing down, pointing to a page and then glancing back up again, still muttering but with a few nods thrown in for good measure.

All while that was happening the weird silver cloud tangle whatever continued to hang there weightlessly, weirdly, trailing down into that chimney. As I kept my eye on it I saw every so often a part of it would flash briefly and brightly and then that flash would condense down - for what of a better word - into the wire and then whizz all the way around so it could down the chimney to wherever all of it came from.

Happened a good dozen or so times in the time it took Rose to double-check things.

“Yeah, yeah, that’s something,” she said once she’d done the book thing a few times, closing it and putting it away again. “The book says that’s a kind of dream skimmer, or looks a lot like one if it isn’t one.”

“‘Dream skimmer’?” I asked, the silly name sour in my mouth. Rose gave me a look that was equally sour.

“I didn’t pick the name, that’s just what the book says one of those is,” she said.

Who knew witches could be so defensive about these things?

And what’s more:

“And how is it skimming dreams anyway? What are dreams doing up there and not in people’s heads? Are they coming from somewhere? Going somewhere? Why? Where? To what end? What are they made of? Who-”

Rose cut me off here, and who could blame her.

“Look, I don’t know a lot about dream mechanics so can we just assume all these questions have answers?”

“Alright,” I said.

She peered at the skimmer some more, and with greater intensity. I also peered at it, more just because I’d never seen anything like it and I didn’t know what to do about it.

I needed to know more.

“Do those things happen?” I asked.

“What?”

“Those things, skimmer things. Are those naturally occurring? Naturally magically occurring, I mean?”

Magic did occur naturally, after a fashion, but I’m sure she knew what I meant. Was this the sort of thing that, if no-one did anything, would happen just because?

“Uh, no. Don’t think so,” Rose said after a moment’s thought.

“So someone made that?”

“Probably. Some witch. No-one I know.”

This was news to me. Not that Rose didn’t know people, that part I could imagine. The other part, the witch part.

“A witch made that?” I asked.

How? Why? How? Why? To what end?

“Probably, I don’t know. Don’t know who else could have, though. They don’t happen naturally like I said and, well, yeah.”

Here Rose tailed off, clearly having run out of things to add. Meanwhile my brain was fizzing.

I wasn’t really sure what I’d expected to come out of any of this, honestly. That there’d been a problem was just conjecture on my part, fuelled largely by lack of sleep and swelling concern for Nisien. 

Learning there was probably something going on was something else, and now coming up and seeing there really, actually was something going on and it was going on because of something someone had gone out of their way to do, well…

Where do you go from there?

To the skimmer, presumably, to knock on the door and ask what the deal was. Or something to that effect. 

Right? Right.

“Where do you reckon that is?” I asked, pointing to the base of the thing, where it stuck out from the chimney. Rose wrinkled her nose as she consulted her mental map. I did likewise, though without the nose wrinkling. 

“Gun street? Maybe? Or around there?” I ventured, when she didn’t reply in good time.

“Maybe…” She said, distantly, plainly lost in thought.

Was she too thinking of what to do next?

Whatever it was we were going to do, we couldn’t do it in the balloon, that was for certain.

“Well, if nothing else we can just go in that direction and look up every so often. That thing isn’t exactly easy to miss,” I said, pointing some more.

Rose continued to be lost in thought for a second before noticing I’d said something and starting, looking to me at last.

“That’s true,” she said, then twigging the implications. “Wait, what? What do you mean?”

“I mean if we go in that direction it shouldn’t be too hard to find the right place. It’ll have a great big silver thing sticking out the top,” I said, pointing at the great big silver thing.

“You mean...going there?” Rose asked, also pointing but without the same confidence I had.

“Of course, what else are we going to do?”

“Um…”

Clearly she hadn’t got as far ahead on this as I had.

“Not an expert, but something funky is going on with the dreams or the dreamscape or the dreamverse or whatever it is the technical term is,” I said. I waved a hand to indicate generally the air around and over us, where dreams apparently liked to float about for reasons I was still unclear on.

“It is none of those terms,” Rose muttered, interrupting but not so intrusively I couldn’t continue:

“And that thing over there is a dream-related thing that someone went out of their way to make happen. I feel confident in saying it’s probably related. And even if it isn’t, maybe they’ll have a clue. Certainly it’s not something we can ignore, is it?”

“It’s just - this isn’t the sort of thing you ever imagine happening to you, it’s meant to happen to someone else,” Rose said. 

I began to get the sneaking impression she was adventure-averse. Guess it’s not something anyone really has a lot of experience with, at least not anyone I know. Certainly I’ve never been on any adventures that I’m aware of. 

Would this count, once it was done? I always imagined adventures would be grander, that they’d involve a mountain and a great trek, not just meandering a few streets over and knocking on a door.

All have to start somewhere, I suppose.

Either way, we had apparently managed to find what it was we’d gone up there to look for, at least to our mutual satisfaction, and so with more box-coaxing Rose brought us back down to the ground and we tidied up and put away the balloon, more-or-less in silence.

Once it was back in its too-small shed thing it was properly dark, evening having shuffled off into night. Everything seems more daunting at night, I find, but my resolve was undimmed.

“Are you still going to go there?” Rose asked with clear trepidation. As previously stated my resolve was undimmed. I nodded.

“I am indeed.”

Her trepidation continued, plain even in the poor lighting of the tiny back garden.

“Alright, okay,” she said at length. “We should do something about it, it’s just I’m not sure what, but that’s not a good reason to not do anything, is it?”

I think she was asking for moral support here.

“Exactly. We’re decent, well-meaning, handsome young people with a thirst for justice. We’ve detected an issue, we’ve spotted a possible cause. It’s the only thing we can do,” I said, putting a reassuring hand onto her shoulder. There’s a technique to doing this.

I don’t think I have the technique down.

“You might have oversold it a bit,” Rose said, her face flat.

“If something is worth doing it’s worth overdoing,” I said.

Her face did not get any less flat. I took my hand off her shoulder.

“...let’s just go,” she said.

We departed the tiny garden and made our way back through the now alarmingly dark back passage and around again to Rose’s, being as it was on our way. 

“I’m going to get a coat,” Rose said. Sensible. I thought I should do the same and as I was thinking this thought a further thought occurred.

“Good idea. I’ll be back in a minute, just hang here. Honestly, two seconds,” I said.

“Alright, alright,” Rose said, disappearing back into hers while I jogged back to mine.

There I obtained a coat and a little extra something and was all set to jog back again when I spied Nisien napping fitfully upon the sofa, cartoons having paused themselves to ask if he wanted to keep watching. He, napping fitfully, was in no condition to answer this question.

Poor lad. I turned the television off, found a blanket - for we had several on hand for these purposes - and laid it over him. The least I could do in the circumstances.

“I’ll get this sorted, don’t you worry,” I said quietly though he, asleep and writhing, could not hear. It’s the thought that counted. And if anyone was watching somehow they’d know about it, too, and see my motivation.

These paranoid fantasies are important to indulge from time to time. Make life more exciting. Who wouldn’t want to be the star of something, even just the once? As unlikely as that might be. What fun.

Anyway. Becoated and equipped I jogged back, finding Rose similarly becoated and waiting in front of her door, rubbing her arms and peering up and down the length of the street. She saw me coming.

“Finally,” she said as I came to a halt before her.

“Yeah sorry, doing a thing. Nice stick.” I said, pointing to what I assumed was a wand she was holding and she, beaming, gave the wand a few swishes and flourishes, 

“Pays to be prepared,” she said.

Rose then noticed what I was holding and her eyes widened a little.

“Why do you have a crowbar?” She asked. Never a question with a good answer. At least not usually. Tonight the answer was definitely a good answer.

I gave it a bounce and then held it up in front of me in both hands.

“Pays to be prepared, like you said. It’s not a magic wand but it’ll get the job done,” I said, giving it a loving stroke. I liked my crowbar. So versatile and yet so simple, truly one of humanity's greatest achievements.

“No-one uses wands…” Rose muttered, in a particular style of mutter that I was quickly coming to recognise. It was the mutter of disapproval that appeared whenever my free-and-easy attitude trampled over important magical matters.

As a professional she takes these matters seriously, clearly.

“What’s that, then?” I asked, pointing to the wand-like, wand-shaped magic stick she’d brought with her. She clutched it to herself somewhat defensively.

“It’s a rod,” she said.

I snorted. Rose took a second to get it.

“Oh grow up. You still didn’t say why you have a crowbar.”

“To break into the house of whoever is doing the thing with that thing,” I said.

If it came to that, obviously. This was me just idly planning ahead. Jacking in the locks and busting open the door wasn’t my first choice but if ways are found to be barred, well, it’s either giving up or pressing through, and crowbars really help with pressing through.

Or so I’ve heard. Tonight might be the night I find out.

Rose didn’t look pleased.

“Breaking in?!” She hissed, again looking up and down the street, this time perhaps in case anyone was about to swoop on us for contemplating ill-behaviour. No-one did, obviously.

“Well, what do you suggest?” I asked.

“Calling the police!”

I suppose I could see the logic in Rose’s suggestion.

“That’s one angle, I’ll grant you.”

“You said we were knocking on their door anyway!”

“Oh of course, that’s the first option. This is for if that doesn’t work,” I said, explaining out-loud what I’d just explained to myself in my own head. Rose’s eyes narrowed.

“I can’t work out if you’re being serious or not,” she said.

At this point I wasn’t wholly sure either, if I’m being honest. Was this an adventure thing? The normal routine of life disrupted to such an extent that we’re not sure what it is we’re meant to do next and what we’re even capable of doing next? The tantalising risk of making a mistake in the heat of the moment? 

What happens in an adventure is always a cut above everyday life after all, isn’t it? Isn’t it? 

I have no frame of reference. I assume so but I could easily be wrong. 

I’m also very tired. It could also be that.

Wilting in the face of Rose’s cast-iron sensibleness I sighed and rubbed my face with the hand not currently full of crowbar.

“Rose, man, I’m exhausted. Nisien is probably one more night away from snapping like a dry twig and some saucy sod is messing about with people’s dreams - yours included. There’s no time to waste and no time like the present,” I said.

Rose looked sympathetic. Still highly skeptical and concerned about me having a crowbar, but sympathetic at least, which was a step in the right direction.

“You still can’t just go...breaking into places,” she said.

I could, anyone could, it’s just more a case of if they should. But that’s semantics, and pedants are no-one’s friend. Never fun being told that actually I think you’ll find that in the original Greek usage of the word such-and-such actually meant so-and-so and so therefore I think you’ll find actually etcetera etcetera. No-one likes those people. No-one liked being that person, either, not really at least. 

Hard to stop the impulse sometimes, though...

“Mean, I can do that if I need to, but that’s only a last resort, honest. We just want to draw a line under this, don’t we?” I asked. Rose fidgeted with her rod - hah - a bit and after a few seconds just threw her hands up in surrender to the moment.

“Alright fine, let’s just go before I think twice about it. Will be interesting to see one of those sifters up close anyway, they sounded very difficult to make,” she said.

“I get to knock on a door, you get to look at a dream sifter, we all get something out of this. Away we go.”

And away we went.

The walk did not actually take that long in real terms, but it felt like a long time. Presumably this was because it was cold, dark and I kept having to ask Rose where the big thing in the sky was. In hindsight should have brought those fancy glasses of hers, oh well.

We arrived. Gun street it was. House on the end of a terrace. Small house, needed a little brushing up but wasn’t falling down. Windows newspapered over, the front garden a veritable graveyard of cardboard boxes and disembowelled white goods.

Kind of a let down, really. Don’t know why but I’d sort of assumed that a qualified witch of the calibre required to make a dream sifter - assuming making one was difficult, which wasn’t a difficult assumption to make - wouldn’t have let their home get into such a state. Thought they’d be more on top of things.

Oh well.

“That was easy,” I said, standing before the gate. The gate was hanging off a single hinge. That level of decrepitude takes effort. If nothing else it shows commitment to wrack and ruin.

“What were you expecting?” Rose asked, blowing into her hands and rubbing them briskly. I shrugged.

“Complications. You know, adventure things,” I said vaguely. I hadn’t had anything concrete in mind, I’d just had the unconscious expectation that someone or something should have got in our way or slowed us down.

“Let’s just knock, it’s cold out here,” Rose said, now rubbing her arms.

“You’re not wrong.”

Up the path I went and knock on the door I did.

Nothing. 

I knocked again. I even rang the bell but it didn’t appear to work so I compensated by knocking some more and harder, too, really letting the door have it.

Continued nothing. Somehow I was not surprised. Who’d answer the door this time of night anyway?

“Maybe they’re not in,” Rose said from behind me.

“Their big dream-snatcher is there, think it’s pretty safe to say they are too. Either too busy or ignoring us. I’d say,” I said, because I was an expert now, apparently. If you wouldn’t leave a pot of boiling water unattended it stood to reason (to me) that you wouldn’t leave a big bit of magical apparatus unattended. It just didn’t seem like a sensible thing to do.

Again, apparently I’m an expert now.

“It’s a sifter, it sifts. A dream snatcher is something else,” Rose said.

This gave me pause. I’d just been being flippant again. There’s always a jolt when you’re joking and inadvertently land on the way things actually are. It’s like missing a step on the way downstairs. Didn’t know where to go from there.

“...learn something new every day,” I said, eventually, giving up on thinking up anything pithier.

Too tired to be hilarious.

“It’s more invasive,” Rose said brightly, as though that wasn’t a horrifying word to appear in such a sentence and in such a context. In fact, it’s kind of a horrifying word to appear in any context, come to think of it. Like the word ‘damp’, ‘invasive’ wasn’t a word you wanted used anywhere near you if you could help it.

Probably some exceptions but now wasn’t the time.

“Lovely. Well, this door isn’t getting more open and we’re not getting any warmer standing out here,” I said, turning around and heading back down the path and around the corner, up the dark and overgrown strip of mud and brambles that was the access to the gardens of the terrace. Rose, flat-footed, lollygagged briefly before hustling to catch up with me.

“Where are you going?” She asked, her voice low.

“Back garden,” I said, hands on the wall of said back garden. Ah, the benefits of it being at the end of a terrace - I only had to jump one wall. How liberating.

“You really are breaking in?” Rose asked.

“Looks that way.”

The wall was about my height and, on peering over, I saw nothing but a scrappy patch of forgotten lawn and some forlorn, long-dead plants. Tossing the crowbar onto the lawn I hauled myself over the wall to recover it, thence heading to the back of the house.

From the sound of things Rose made much more complicated work of mounting the wall. I wasn’t watching. I was considering the task ahead of me.

Backdoor. Windows. Which would be best for entry, I wondered? What would a burglar think?

“I can’t believe you’re actually serious!” Rose whispered, having come to huddle beside me.

“Neither can I, but this is where events have led us.”

“Breaking and entering?!”

“They started this when they broke into Nisien’s nighttime routine. And yours. And mine. And presumably some other people we don’t know personally but who are also suffering. Time to return the favour.”

‘They’ in this case being whoever was in the house, obviously, assuming their dream sifter was at all involved in the dream-related business going on. Which this whole trip was kind of in aid of clarifying.

I know this, why am I thinking this?

Rose sputtered, apparently having too many arguments against this to pick one and instead trying to expel them all at once. Really, I could understand. There were likely dozens of superior ways of approaching this situation. But I’d picked this one and I was committed now.

What’s an adventure without regret, anyway? How else are we to grow?

Arbitrarily I decided to go in through a window and so moved towards the downstairs one, crowbar at the ready. I was all set to get jamming and prying when Rose put a hand on my arm.

“Wait,” she said, quietly.

“Hmm?” I asked, crowbar poised for crowing and barring.

“Don’t - don’t go breaking things yet. Give me a second,” she said, ushing me backward with a gentle sweep of her arm. I allowed myself to be ushered. Now I was the one huddling behind and I watched as Rose unsheathed her rod-

-snrk-

As Rose took out the smooth, imposing length of her impressive rod-

-hurhurhur-

No, come on, this is serious. Try again.

As Rose took her magic rod and did something magical with it. I obviously couldn’t see the finer, technical details of what it was she did. To me it just looked like waving the tip of the thing around the window and poking it in a place or two. I assumed it was all very deliberate though and not for the first time I could only admire her quiet dedication to her craft.

The latch on the window also clicked. Unlocked.

Fancy that.

Rose put her rod away again and gave the window an experimental lift. The bottom pane rose smoothly on its sashes, didn’t even squeak. Just like that the window was wide open for us. 

You’d have thought the house of a witch would have had better security? Tsch.

“Very swish, Rose. Sorry, crowbar, you’ll have your go,” I said, moving past Rose and clambering in without a moment’s hesitation.

After all, if you’ve got time to think you’ve got time to think twice, and who has time for that?

Given what the outside had been like I’d rather expected the inside to be a similar picture of neglect - I’d gone in expecting heaps of ancient newspaper and jars of toenail clippings - but once my eyes adjusted I instead found it, well, not like that.

It wasn’t the picture of luxurious and it was certainly a little cramped but it was at least organised. Books on shelves, books in boxes, books on side tables, a lot of books. 

Witches do like to read, if Rose was any indication, so this tracked.

“Can’t believe I’m going along with this…” Rose griped from behind me, still following. “We’re going to get arrested.”

I disagreed with this.

“We’re not going to get arrested,” I said, firmly.

Best way, I felt. Direct. Sound confident, like you know for sure.

“You don’t know that!” She hissed.

Negativity up in here, let me tell you. No good at all. I turned back to her and put my hands on my hips, the stance of low-grade irritation. 

“If I believe it hard enough it’ll come true. Worrying about it won’t make it less likely, so let’s just be optimistic, eh? Anyway, let’s do whatever it is we’re here to do.”

“What are we here to do?” She asked. She was plainly unmoved by the placement of my hands on my hips. Made of stern stuff, was Rose. I think that’s a witch thing. Ineffable forces and all that. Contemplating the weave underpinning reality and all that.

“We’re here to stop the bad dream thing,” I said. We’d been over this, I thought.

“How are we doing that?” Rose asked without missing a beat.

I blinked.

Huh.

Again, this was one of those things that I’d just hoped would make itself obvious as and when we got to it. No-one seems to have to worry about these sorts of things in adventures, they just flow naturally. There’s sometimes a little thinking involved, I’ll grant, but it happens without issue, just organically. The solution should have been obvious. Ideally, I should already have been doing it.

But I was not. Hmm.

Okay, maybe this was harder than I had initially thought it would be. Again, I’m blaming this on being sleep-deprived. Really makes it hard to get your ducks in a row.

Playing for time, I used my crowbar to scratch my head.

“Um,” I said, continuing to play for time while Rose stared at me in exasperated expectation. “Um. Well. Obviously we need to find the thing, so we need to look around. Place isn’t too big so that shouldn’t take too long and once we find it, um, well, you’re the witch so you’ll tell me what’s what and we can, um, figure out our next step, I guess.”

Improvising was one of my strong points. Maybe. It was tonight, at least. It kind of had to be.

Maybe once we found the thing Rose could just poke it with her magic stick and that’d fix the problem? Maybe our streak of luck would continue and this whole thing would be a cakewalk?

Chance be a fine thing.

“Why are we the ones doing this?” Rose asked. I had to shake my head at her. Such a negative influence tonight, such a drag.

“Come on, Rose, it’s a little late for that. And besides, why not us? Someone has to! We went over this outside and-” I said, but that was as far as I got because behind me I heard a creak and as I heard that creak I also saw Rose’s eyes widen. Oh dear. I turned.